Oscar's bottom thanks you for your kind wishes!
The Bottom is Re-growing Fur.
Aloe vera and cuddles were the only intervention.
We now believe the Bottom was placed upon a heating element upon the stove-top in the Illicit Pursuit of Food, with resultant trauma.
We hope the Owner of the Bottom has Learned His Lesson.
We did not Cuddle the Bottom, as such, if Anyone became Confused by the above post.
Dear Internet Posters - I am the librarian at a very reputable library in Sydney Australia. We have just had to remove a gentleman (a variable term) who was reading at this terminal, because he appears to have been so overcome by nausea that..... well, let's just say that industrial chemicals and steam cleaning MAY render the building and collection fit for the use of patrons again.
Please do NOT (best Librarian tone) post such ramblings about cat's backsides and vile cute comments on the Internet again where innocent and sensitive members of the public may read them. This poor fellow may be scarred for life (see also: Post-Traumatic Stress Disorder), we may possibly have to refer this incident to Australian Library Industry Association.
Signed, a Venerable and Senior Librarian
Sickening, wasn't it?
Still - how DOES one address a bottom?
Hmmm - well, this is what Titania said to HER Bottom:
I pray thee, gentle mortal, sing again:
Mine ear is much enamour'd of thy note;
So is mine eye enthralled to thy shape;
And thy fair virtue's force perforce doth move me,
On the first view to say, to swear, I love thee.
That is what some say - I say arse.
No are, but ears, when he were an ass.
Dear Bottom of Oscar,
I'm so pleased you're recovering. And PLEASE don't try your silly act on the stove-top again! Be good!
Love,
msolga
he'll end up IN the food if he tries that one again...
Curry of Oscar? Oscar stew?
Roast Oscar?
Either way you want to call it, it's still just eating pus.................................
Pussycat? Yes, Stilly, yes.
I'd have him curried, I think, Msolga - I hear they taste just like chicken...
So... I had forgotten about this thread, see it near the top of the pile today and all I can think of is Oscar the Grouch from Seseme Street. Is Oscar the Grouch on Seseme Street in Oz I wonder?
Anyway, Oscar is a Mucking Fuppet, so what's the matter with Oscar the Grouch is that a muppeteer (Carol Spinney? same as Big Bird? I'll ask #2 son) has his arm up his bottom.
Maybe that's why he's such a grouch.
