Do women worship money?

I definitely don't see that with the younger women I work with.

Hi Osso, I'm not sure what's left you feeling bereft and stupid. From what I've seen, you are a wonderful person with a deep understanding of who you are...there's no 'bereft, or stupid' in that. Many 'intelligent' (I rather dislike using that - it can be so misleading) people don't come close.

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And soundsighted, I don't think you fully comprehend the power of our instincts. We all comprehend the power of our genetic survival instincts, and a mothers instincts, and because we label those instincts 'good' we have no issue with them...but because we have an issue with our genetic attraction instincts, we discount the power of them? That doesn't make sense.

We may have a higher brain capable of wonderful creativity and understanding...but it often isn't even aware of how our more primitive brain functions and affects it. It is this higher brain that is attracted to humour, genuineness etc...and it in turn, can affect one of our other more primitive brains that deals with emotions. (scientists have found that the brain has sever 'sub organs', one part of the rear base of the skull deals with instincts, on top of that is a part that deals with emotions, and at the forehead is a part that deals with higher thought, plus a few other sub organs - and they all interact, but don't necessarily agree with each other...hence why we are often conflicted)

This is not to say we can't overrule out instincts - we can. We can even add to them (I found a wonderful book once that claimed that everything we learn gets coded into our genes - which would actually explain how dog breeds acquire certain instincts that they get trained for)

Humans of course, being complex creatures & capable of higher thought, carry out those instincts in rather varied ways. Some in good ways, some in bad ways.

I'm a big mess, my dog just died.

http://able2know.org/topic/187834-1


I don't want to somehow milk that, but my dog and I talked.

Indeed, she was my dog because of circumstances that let her be my dog.



On women worshiping money, I can see extreme need as an incentive.

Ah, I'm sorry to hear of your loss - I love dogs.

Mine is 8 or 9 now (for some reason I'm can't recall the exact year I got her), and a husky x shepherd. So she's past middle age now, and I'm not looking forward to her slipping into old age.

...she even believes that she's still a puppy, and get's unduly excited at the thought of food (leaps up in the air several times when I ask her if she wants something to eat - her hind feet actually leave the ground)...even if her main meals are the same stuff every day ! (dogs are crazy)

She's a little bit of a jumper (I see that yours wasn't), but I'm lead to believe that's the husky genes. She has a beautiful nature (everyone that meets her keeps mentioning this).

And she still chases the vacuum cleaner head around the house.

Just sharing a dog story

Be well.

I would think (although don't know for sure) that our genetic attraction instincts would evolve along with our species. Why then would women have such a harder time evolving then men? Seems lazy to me. Oh course it's easier to do what you've always done, and it's easier to think the way you've always thought.

Well regardless of whether women are more predisposed to worshiping money or not, I just feel a great deal anger and grief about what happened. Not looking for sympathy, but it feels somewhat to good to express my feelings anonymously. Even before my brother died it angered me when she belittled him. Whether she was the only reason or not for what happened, In my mind personally she was. It's hard to watch someone mistreat someone you love, especially when you want that person to be happy (even if being with that abusive person is part of what makes them happy.) My brother never showed signs of anything like this before, and I can't pretend that the way she treated him was anywhere close to the realm of being right.

Thanks, Vik. And ditto re dogs.

Part of what you are going to have to terms with is your brother's decision to stay with a woman who you say had belittled him over the years.

He made a series of decisions that will likely never make sense to you.

It's probably not a bad idea to vent anonymously as you've done here - but you may also eventually need some more practical individual support.

Agreed.

Oh, and Katy did jump with certain people, Roger of a2k who was part of my getting her to be my dog. She loved him.

And we let her. Bad us.

Excuse me, soundsighted - that was a relatively unusual situation for vikorr and I to talk.

Hi Osso,

I'm sometimes surprised we don't talk more...but I think I come & go from these forums a bit.

Hi Sound,

It would anger me too if my if any wife of a brother of mine wife belittled him - my anger though, would be directed towards the individual, and not towards women in general.

While we share common descent, and therefore all have similar genes in common...the human race throws up varied genes in just about every facet, so to become angry with women in general is to go down a very erroneous path.

A woman who's the victim of physical abuse by her husband could go down the road of hating men, because men are more genetically prone to dealing with frustration/anger etc through violence...does that mean all men are this way? That the domestically beaten woman should hate and blame all men?

It's an incredibly sad situation you are in, and anger is completely understandable...I'm concerned that you are directing your anger at the wrong target (ie women in general), which is likely to eventually make this harder for you to deal with it. Does not your anger have a specific target? Is not a specific person responsible for their own actions?

Lastly, as a previous poster mentioned...as sad as it is...and no doubt there existed many valid reasons...your brother did choose to stay with someone who put him down. Can you think of all the reasons why he chose to stay? Understanding that may help.

Vikorr is speaking about our instincts, which are supposedly (and quite mysteriously) coded in our genes. Men and women evolve genetically at a speed close to zero, and they do so together since evolution implies reproduction.

We have to live with a very very old human nature, 99% similar to that of Chimps, and in very fast-moving societies which impose their own social norms, which are new and changing fast. It's not easy.

When I was a teen, I remember finding the whole courtship and "love" informal rules and behaviors, in particular the alpha male stereotypical behavior and the female stereotypical response, quite shocking. I said to myself: let the apes court one another, I will take no part in it. I never courted or hit on a woman ever since, except once or twice perhaps... I've been hit on on occasion, fortunately... But in retrospect, that was a very stupid and childish decision to make. For with a more forgiving attitude towards my own human brothers and sisters, if I had been more accommodating with social and instinctive behaviors, if I could have looked at it simply as a game with a set of rules which one must go by, and can learn and actually play with pleasure -- I could have had a more pleasurable life.

Don't you youngman start thinking that all women are like that bitch who harassed and dumped your brother for money. Don't you live your life thinking that most women are like that or worship money. A lot of them are quite nice. Of course they like money and power and protection, but they also like... well... shall we say physical grace, and a good sense of humor, and good sex, and being loved, and creativity, intelligence and kindness. Or also roughness, it depends largely on the girl, and the moment.

I am almost certain there was one girl (or several) who fall in love with your brother at some point, and that she was probably not an asshole. Nice, funny and generous women do exist.

Perhaps even the majority, I don't know enough of them to tell.

Thank you, I really appreciate your comments. I'm not (that) young though. 5 years younger than my brother. I really hope your right though because I'd like to get married someday. But like my brother I have debt too. Perhaps a better thread to start would've been to talk about the social climate in my country that allows people who want to better themselves and society to go into debt for their whole lives just because they try to educate themselves. Becoming slaves to a system that economically oppresses them.

My last girlfriend was pretty awesome though, so I do know at least one out there who isn't an asshole. But then we didn't get married... who knows maybe my finances were an issue for her that I wasn't aware of? But at any rate I'll certainly never be rich. I hope someone will be accepting of that.

May I ask how old you are?

The other day I was in a bar with a friend and next to us was this charming young couple, evidently in love, both with a ring on their finger. We chatted a bit and I asked a few questions (I am curious by nature). Turns out they were 22/23, married, but... not to one another! They were having an affair, and a very sweet one apparently. Both got married at like 20, and both regretted it bitterly now. Fortunately they had found one another, and I said “go for it”.

There’s no need to jump into matrimony at such a tender age. People say life is short but I should think you have plenty of time.

Plenty of time to repay your debts, too. Richness is relative. The only thing you need to do to become a well-off man is find a reasonably well-paid job in the Philippines, Indonesia, Thailand, Brazil, Argentina or anywhere in Africa. E.g. if you don’t mind working on an oil platform for months, or if a company sends you abroad anywhere in the “Third World”, you can make pretty decent money. You’ll be rich relative to the rest of the population, and chased after by scores of gold-diggers…