I bought this steering wheel cover. . . .

Try local flea markets. If you've got one with a bunch of immigrants who set up a stand with a hundred cardboard cartons with a hundred different products from China and India and Malaysia, they'll probably have steering wheel covers too. I know they do in Revere MA.

That's what you need Roger! An Alabama steering wheel cover! I think the tennis racket tape sounds like a good idea.

I can't get the "slippery as snake snot" out of my head.

They helped me with replacement wipers too, and installed them happily.. which saved me lots of aggravation.

My last one was also designed for a 15" wheel, which is what I had. I may have a talk with them on guaranteed fit.

I'm pretty sure putty is a color. Most office filing cabinets are putty (colored).