Is It Wrong To Get My Daughter Re baptized?

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Okay, My daughter was baptized her her fathers church when she was three weeks old (Catholic). I am not Catholic. I belong to a Lutheran Church. I had her baptized at her fathers church because I believed it was the right thing to do since I was going to have a membership changed after we got married. Well I found out a few months ago that her dad is an atheist now and at the time are her baptism. With this being the situation now I was going to have her baptized in my church on Saturday. I have not told the minister that she was baptized in the Catholic Church because I honestly do not believe that she had a true baptized there. These are the reasons:
1.) Her dad was an atheist at the time
2.) We have not been back to that church since her baptism (we have been going to my church)
3.) The "baptism" was done in a hurry, the father (pastor) acted like he didn't even want to be there (it was done after church and it was his lunch time, he actually told us that)
4.) I honestly do not believe in some of the teachers that the Catholic Church does (That's why Im Lutheran)
5.) With The "Baptism" the father was in such a rush that we couldn't even understand what he was saying because he was reading so fast

My questions are the following:
1.) Is It wrong for me to have her re baptized in my church
2.) Is it wrong for her father to stand up with me and promise to raise her in the christian faith. He might not believe everything but he will stand beside me in what i teach her even if he don't believe in it
3.) Will her baptism be Valid in the Lutheran Church (The one that Im doing on Saturday)

Thanks

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Type: Question • Score: 8 • Views: 2,787 • Replies: 13

@dreamsdocometrue,

1.) Is It wrong for me to have her re baptized in my church
Not wrong, just redundant.

2.) Is it wrong for her father to stand up with me and promise to raise
her in the christian faith. He might not believe everything but he will
stand beside me in what i teach her even if he don't believe in it
It's not wrong for him to promise it as long as he intends to do it.

3.) Will her baptism be Valid in the Lutheran Church (The one that Im doing
on Saturday)
Ask the minister. I believe he will say that the previous baptism was and
is valid.

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What you are doing is very wrong. You are using your daughter as a pawn.

What you and your ex-husband do to each other your business. But when you involve your daughter in whatever ugliness you are is going on between you and your ex you are being really irresponsible as a parent.

Baptism, if it means anything, is a matter between your daughter and God. Assuming your daughter is a child and is too young to make this decision on her own, you are asking a ridiculous question. She should be allowed to make her own decisions about her life.

When your daughter is old enough to think for herself, then she can decide whether to be baptized or not. Who knows she may want to be a Atheist herself or Buddhist, Muslim or anything else.

Pushing your religion on your kids who when they are too young to object is bad enough. If you are doing this as part of a fight between you and her father it is incredibly bad parenting.

My advice. Leave you daughter out of this. Let her make her own decision when she is old enough to have it mean something.

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@maxdancona,

maxdancona wrote:

My advice. Leave you daughter out of this. Let her make her own decision when she is old enough to have it mean something.

My advice too.

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@dreamsdocometrue,

In all sincerity, do you not have other things to worry about?

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@maxdancona,

Umm.... I can't find any reference to an ex-husband here, are you sure you read that right?

1 Reply

@dreamsdocometrue,

I read this again and I realize my answer may have been confusing. Also,
I missed an important part of your post. You said you have not told your
minister about your daughter's baptism at the Catholic church. I'd advise
you to sit down and have a talk with your minister about this.

Lutheran and Catholic sacramental theology are quite similar in regard to
baptism. In other words, both Lutherans and Catholics believe pretty
much the same things about baptism. They both believe that baptism
is a once-in-a-lifetime thing. They both believe that the efficacy of
baptism does not depend on the faith of the father. They both employ
the same sort of ritual.

For those reasons, I think that your minister will tell you that your
daughter is already baptized. I'm sorry, I know that this is not the
answer you wanted to hear. You want to do it over and have a better
experience. Please talk to your minister.

All the best to you and your little one!

~George

1 Reply

@dreamsdocometrue,

Which synod are you a member of? The Evangelical Lutherin Church is much more liberal than the Missouri Synod or the Wisconsin Synod. Talk to your pastor. Be honest and tell him the whole story. Otherwise you'll be second guessing yourself and wondering if your daughter is baptized at all in the eyes of god.

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@wayne,

Wayne, I reread and maybe its not clear it is an ex husband. Obviously there is an "ex" of some sort in this story. But that is not the point.

The important question is what is best for the daughter.

I can say with confidence that this baptism has nothing to do with your daughter's needs. Your daughter doesn't care and frankly God doesn't care. This question is about adults worrying about there own needs, perhaps at the expense of this child.

If the father supports this, then I withdraw my strong objection. Get the father's support and I have no problem with you having your daughter go through whatever ritual you need to make yourself feel better (as long as you give your daughter the freedom to find her own way when she is older).

But, if this is a conflict between two adults, then putting your daughter in the middle of it through this ritual is unthinkable.

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@George,

Excellent answer, George! <applause>

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@Eva,

Thanks, Eva.

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@dreamsdocometrue,

My opinion - discuss it with the Lutheran Minister. Just be open and honest about it. He will direct you on what is right for you and your family.

Everyone has their own beliefs so some one may say this Baptist is valid vs. some one else saying it is not. If your true belief is with the Lutheran Church, then discuss with your minister the correct approach for you.

Some personal experiences I've been witness to - I know many people that were baptized in the Catholic Church as a baby. Then they decide as an adult, to attend another Christian Church/philsophy. Often times, they are baptized then as an adult in that particular church. Some Christian churches belief you need to personally accept God/Jesus before being baptized. I am not stating one belief is correct over another just that they are different so it is not uncommon to baptized is a different church later in life.

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@Linkat,

The Catholic Church and the Lutheran Churches here in Germany (as well as the other Evangelical and Reformed Churches) accept each others baptism since they all consider it to be a sacrament.

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@Linkat,

The Catholic Church, the Lutheran Churches and as far as I know also the Anglican Church accept one anothers Baptism, which means you are baptized and do not have to nor really can be baptized again. A baptism is for lifetime.
It you join a denomination which believes in grown up baptism then you have to be baptised again - but that is not the case here.

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Is It Wrong To Get My Daughter Re baptized?

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