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In need of the opening line

 
 
tycoon
 
Reply Sun 12 Dec, 2010 09:16 pm
I've nearly completed my sweeping novel, except that I have not decided on how to word the very first sentence.

Can ATK help me in writing that memorable line?

Thank you for your input in advance. I'm sure I've come to the right place for advice.
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Type: Question • Score: 5 • Views: 1,628 • Replies: 21
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dyslexia
 
  1  
Reply Sun 12 Dec, 2010 09:19 pm
@tycoon,
Yes, I'm sure you have.
Ceili
 
  1  
Reply Sun 12 Dec, 2010 09:19 pm
You might want to give a clue about the subject.
tsarstepan
 
  1  
Reply Sun 12 Dec, 2010 09:20 pm
@tycoon,
Well we should need a brief synopsis of the novel. Who will be speaking the opening line: a narrator, the lead character, etc? Will it need to be in the first person or the third person?
edgarblythe
 
  1  
Reply Sun 12 Dec, 2010 09:24 pm
@tycoon,
Discard the entire first chapter, then submit.
0 Replies
 
tycoon
 
  1  
Reply Sun 12 Dec, 2010 09:25 pm
@dyslexia,
dyslexia wrote:

Yes, I'm sure you have.


This is pretty good! Selected answer so far!
0 Replies
 
tycoon
 
  1  
Reply Sun 12 Dec, 2010 09:27 pm
@Ceili,
Ceili wrote:

You might want to give a clue about the subject.


Not bad, but perhaps a bit vague. Maybe a little tightening?
0 Replies
 
tycoon
 
  1  
Reply Sun 12 Dec, 2010 09:28 pm
@tsarstepan,
tsarstepan wrote:

Well we should need a brief synopsis of the novel. Who will be speaking the opening line: a narrator, the lead character, etc? Will it need to be in the first person or the third person?


I reject this submission. I don't like colons.
0 Replies
 
Fido
 
  1  
Reply Sun 12 Dec, 2010 09:38 pm
@Ceili,
Ceili wrote:

You might want to give a clue about the subject.
Ha ha ha ha ha from deep within my trunk, and not the one in the basement...
Fido
 
  1  
Reply Sun 12 Dec, 2010 09:42 pm
@tycoon,
tycoon wrote:

I've nearly completed my sweeping novel, except that I have not decided on how to word the very first sentence.

Can ATK help me in writing that memorable line?

Thank you for your input in advance. I'm sure I've come to the right place for advice.


It was not about this or that, or about anything, not about love, or trust, or honor, or revenge, and thinking it was about something was my first and greatest mistake from which all other mistakes followed...
0 Replies
 
tycoon
 
  1  
Reply Sun 12 Dec, 2010 09:43 pm
@Fido,
Fido wrote:


Ha ha ha ha ha from deep within my trunk, and not the one in the basement...


This has real possibilities. Seems to tie in very well.
0 Replies
 
roger
 
  1  
Reply Sun 12 Dec, 2010 09:44 pm
It was the best of times; it was the worst of times.

Or maybe you would like something like "Call me Ishmael".

They are both catchy, and if you also don't like semi colons, you could probably work around it.
laughoutlood
 
  1  
Reply Sun 12 Dec, 2010 09:45 pm
@tycoon,
He thought of himself as a bit of a tycoon like most petty thieves.
Fido
 
  1  
Reply Sun 12 Dec, 2010 09:47 pm
@laughoutlood,
laughoutlood wrote:

He thought of himself as a bit of a tycoon like most petty thieves; but he found he was a foil in the hands of buffoons; the police..
0 Replies
 
tycoon
 
  1  
Reply Sun 12 Dec, 2010 09:49 pm
@roger,
roger wrote:

It was the best of times; it was the worst of times.



No, the semicolon is the deal breaker.Those ******* things. Besides, it's like you can't decide whether it's the best or the worst time. Very indecisive. This would never work. Very amateurish.
roger
 
  1  
Reply Sun 12 Dec, 2010 09:55 pm
@tycoon,
You're right. I tried to pull that one, but it was too late to edit.
0 Replies
 
tsarstepan
 
  1  
Reply Sun 12 Dec, 2010 09:59 pm
@tycoon,
Once upon a time you might have called me Tweedle Dum.
Fido
 
  1  
Reply Sun 12 Dec, 2010 10:28 pm
@tsarstepan,
tsarstepan wrote:

Once upon a time you might have called me Tweedle Dum.
What would you have done with him??? Make him squeal like a pig???
0 Replies
 
Finn dAbuzz
 
  1  
Reply Sun 12 Dec, 2010 11:22 pm
@tycoon,
These things always take time.
0 Replies
 
wayne
 
  1  
Reply Sun 12 Dec, 2010 11:30 pm
You see, it's never really been about you at all.
0 Replies
 
 

 
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