Mom Taught Me ( Not really trivial)

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I'm sure most of us can remember some of these ....

MOM TAUGHT ME TO APPRECIATE A JOB WELL DONE: "If you're going to kill
each other, do it outside, I just finished cleaning!"

MOM TAUGHT ME RELIGION:
"You better pray that will come out of that carpet!"

MOM TAUGHT ME ABOUT TIME TRAVEL:
"If you don't straighten up, I'll knock you into next week!"

MOM TAUGHT ME LOGIC:
"Because I said so, that's why!"

MOM TAUGHT ME FORESIGHT:
"Make sure you wear clean underwear in case you're in an accident."

MOM TAUGHT ME IRONY:
"Keep laughing and I'll give you something to cry about!"

MOM TAUGHT ME ABOUT THE SCIENCE OF OSMOSIS: "Shut your mouth and eat
your supper!"

MOM TAUGHT ME ABOUT CONTORTIONISM:
"Will you look at the dirt on the back of your neck?"

MOM TAUGHT ME ABOUT STAMINA:
"You'll sit there until all that spinach is gone!"

MOM TAUGHT ME ABOUT WEATHER:
"It looks like a tornado went through your room!"

MOM TAUGHT ME HOW TO SOLVE PHYSICS PROBLEMS: "If I yelled because I saw
a meteor coming toward you, would you listen then?"

MOM TAUGHT ME ABOUT HYPOCRISY:
"If I told you once, I've told you a million times-don't exaggerate!"

MOM TAUGHT ME ABOUT BEHAVIOR MODIFICATION: "Stop acting like your
father!"

MOM TAUGHT ME ABOUT ENVY:
"There are millions of less fortunate kids in this world who don't have
wonderful parents like you do!"

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Phoenix

Did you pen these?

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blatham- No, but I wish I had. It was sent to me by a friend.

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Well, you aren't alone in wishing you had - they are very bright and funny. Thank you dearly for them.

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These are great, Phoenix. Laughing

Thanks. And remember the one from Bambi? The one Thumper said: My Mama aways said if you can't say somethin' nice, don't say nothin' at all. Thump thump thump

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Raggedyaggie- I will never say anything about a person unless it is good. And boy, it has to be REAL GOOD!

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I know exactly what you mean, Phoenix. Laughing

Silence is Golden.

Oh, I remember another Mom one. I can still hear my mother singing:

I'm Popeye the Sailor Man, Popeye the Sailor Man,
I eats all my spinach
I fights to the finish
I'm Popeye the Sailor Man.

She said if I ate all my spinach, I'd be big and strong like Popeye. (To this day, I've not been able to figure out why she thought her little girl would want to grow up to look like Popeye Confused

)

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I actually do recall a gentleman taking my shoe off in the shoe store with mother sitting beside me, revealing a sock with toes exposed. Even the kind salesman withered under her glare.

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Mom Taught Me ( Not really trivial)

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