People who shouldn't have goldfish, nevermind kids

Although San Diego is a beautiful laid back town, crime has its moments
here too, especially in recent years. The daily crime rate here is equivalent
to a year's worth in Germany.

Hey, Slappy, I work in those neighborhoods of Baltimore.
Yeah, Yikes.


Now, did I read that right? You were thinking of throwing your girlfriend under either a car or bus?

Yes, you read right Caribou. That is a normal daily thought process for Slappy

I agree that it's probably a cultural difference. But as the old saying goes, "When in Rome....."

If you're living in the U.S. you need to be aware that leaving an infant outside by itself is putting the child at serious risk. That lady needs to wake up. We're not in China anymore, Toto.

I agree SC!

Yes that's true to a certain extend. I had once neighbors from Japan
who were here for a limited time. Their 4 year old son was all over the
neighborhood by himself, visiting neighbors and staying at their house
for quite a while and his parents didn't mind. Now there is virtually no
crime in Japan and the parents simply trusted everyone. They didn't
speak much English, so it was hard to explain to them that they need
to watch that little boy of theirs.

It is cultural. During an overseas visit, I heard if the police found out I beheaded a prostitute, I would have been arrested.

Lucky you! Here in the States you would have to wear a chicken suit
and walk the streets.

I believe getting involved is appropriate if a child is likely to be in danger, however, this could definitely be true about the cultural thing. What I usually do in situations like that (because like you said yelling really ends up not changing anything) is simply keeping an eye on the child myself from a distance. Sine I would prefer not to see the child hurt or taken.

I also have spoken to children myself when they were unattended - only if they speak with me first of course. Once in a video arcade this kid came up to me (about 6) that I didn't know and asked me to give him some tokens. One I was pissed at the nerve of the little monster and also realizing his parents left him alone there while they were probably shopping - I decided to lecture the kid. I told him how dangerous it was to approach strangers much less ask them for money and I went on and on to him. If I saw his parent(s) I would have let them know what he was doing - rather than yell at them just let them know what he doing I felt was wrong.

It might have worked better to explain to the parent (rather than yell at them) that is it isn't consider safe to leave the child alone without an adult - sort of focus on the safety thing rather than berate the parent that he or she was doing something wrong. Last week I had my 4 year old with me while we waiting to get a tire fixed. There was a couple there - obviously foreign especially since my lovely daughter announced loudly that they spoke silly. Any how, they were smiling at her and waving and crap like that because she was trying so hard to be adorable and annoying and stuff. When we were leaving the man grabbed my daughter's arm and smiled to say goodbye. My daughter looked up at me in horror (some stranger trying to grab me). Instead of yelling at them and calling the guy an idiot - which I wanted to do, I explained my daughter understands she is not supposed to talk to strangers. I figured that is was more a cultural thing and they didn't mean any harm.

I could go on and on about things like this. But I'll just say that berating the mother is probably counterproductive, and I wonder whether people would have been as angry with a father in the same situation. Also, it is up to a parent to assess the risks to their children. In this case, apparently the woman did not have the information to make that assessment because of cultural differences.

I expect that Gargamel's approach is the only one that would make an impression.

My mum left me outside a shop in my buggy once. She claimed she forgot.

My dad once didn't notice that I had fallen out of the car when he was driving. Claimed he didn't see me.

That there woman has stereotyped prejudices. Things have changed a great deal in my lifetime, as well. As a boy, i walked from the southwest side of town to the northeast side of town to get school each day, and, of course, back again in the afternoon. It was a distance, one way, of more than a mile. Not only were we unattended for hours on end, almost every day, we were held responsible, on pain of violent physical punishment, for assuring that nothing untoward happened while unsupervised.

I remember, as a kid, a friend telling me: If I die in the street, my dad will kill me!

Americans seem verra paranoid to me - in a lot of areas. Not sure where it comes from.

Then again, I'm much more afraid of travelling in a number of European countries than the U.S. because of anecdotes by friends and family of muggings and pickpocketing.

See, that's just what i mean. "My folks will kill me!" was a pretty commonly used expression.

All you have to do is watch the news to wonder why we watch our kids so closely. The POSSIBILITY of it happening is scary at best. I would never forgive myself if I let my child venture out on his own somewhere I wasn't sure he was safe. This day and age there SEEM to be so many deviants that I can't trust them. It's not trusting my kids that is the problem.

Bus Stop - Child Predator Hunting Grounds

All you have to do is read the above article to want to keep your child in sight at all times.

Growing up we walked everywhere...to the store, to school, we were dropped off at the Mall at the movies...Mom and Dad never gave a thought to it. It was a different world back then. At the very least we just didn't know about what was going on. I suppose that was a possibility. This day and age with media intent on keeping us abreast of every situation (I am not complaining) there is no way in hell I would let my child do anything without adult supervision. I am not sure how to remedy the whole being overprotective thing to be honest. I just want them to be safe...and this world - is just not for kids these days. At least from all I read...I may be paranoid....or overprotective. I am just not sure how to correct it.

Mismi, you just explained exactly how I feel about it. This isn't the old days and now that we are aware of what can happen to a child left unattended, it's only natural for us, as parents, to do whatever it is we have to do to keep our kids safe.

It seems so unfair, but that's just the way it is.

The odds of being attacked by an animal while walking in the woods is slim, but you go near mommies cubs, your odds change dramatically!

Some call it being over protective, but I don't see it that way. I've met some over protective parents, but their situations don't apply here.

I know, I mourn for the days when kids could wander all over the place, learning the "shortcuts" and "secret passageways" and hidden "clubhouses" in their neighborhoods. It was how we learned to navigate, I think.

My question is, how long should we insist on parental supervision? Until they're 10, 12, 14...or until they get their driver's license? It has to stop someday. How old is old enough?

I have a 13 year old now. Surely it's time to give him more physical freedom.