Happy Birthday, Lord Ellpus!

Now there's a Nair commercial just dying to be written.

No doubting that, Francis. When the ladies realise you're back in town, we'll probably hear funny noises here and there as several hundred ovaries start popping.

Nice to see you back, Mon ami!

Thanks, Sakhi....I take it that a nice parcel of home made samosas are in the post?

Mmmmmm.......(Homer voice).....Samosas!

I've always been told that my legs look like two bits of string, dangling from a bucket.

.......I can see why now.....

(pssst....I only had ONE dance with that fellow in the tie, then my hairpiece fell off so I went home )

Happy b'day Lordy !! Too tired (Too much golf) and too hungover (too much shiraz) to post something witty.....

So can you buy a condom now without blushing?

Are they still made of sheep's intestine?

I'll see if I blush, next time I'm at the barbers, as that's the only place that's allowed to sell them I think.

Can I have a twelve pack of featherlite large please

x

A belated best to you, LordE. Hopefully, it was the happiest of days and may you have many more!

Happy belated birthday to my secret uncle that the family doesnt like to talk about.

Happy Birthday, Elpus.

Don't wear out the spatulas.

Better late than never I suppose -- Happy Birthday Lord E. !!

Blimey, this threads still going........Maybe I can keep it running 'til my next one.


Thanks, Bun lady, Blacky, MG, Drew and Tai.

I'm off to bed now, with my dozen featherlite large condoms.

Hope I survive 'til morning.

G'night!

Wait, LordE!

Don't forget your new spatula!



HAHAHA! I got you!
Now it's official. You've received a birthday spanking.

Good heavens! I swear, I didn't know it was going to be that big!


(Hope I didn't kill him!)

LordE, I got so cold down in the garden waiting for you ... I had to get borrow one of LadyE's wraps. I hope she won't mind that I've been into yourerrrher closet.


your real prezzie is under my wrap ... you'll have to ... touch it ...with your magic cursor

I bet thats not the first time Lord Ellpus has heard that!!

....and not the last, I hope, as soon as this cold weather moves away.

Re. that Calendar, ebeth (I'll write this
in short sentences, owing to Eva stretching the
Page with my enormous rear end - I MUST
go on a diet!)....anyway, re. the Calendar...
...it brings back memories of early youth,
and walking past my parents' bedroom!
I looked through the open door as I passed, to
see my Mum putting back down the enormous
lid of a "tall boy" cupboard.
I didn't even know that it HAD a lid, and just
thought it was a solid top.
Needless to say, as soon as the coast was clear,
and being the nosey bugger that I am, I sneaked in and
opened up this secret lid.....and spied all sorts of
wondrous things, including a few magazines that had
ladies in them, very similar to those in your Calendar,
but slightly more naked!

Strange and unusual things happened to me that day, as
I was immediately launched into full blown adolescence!

It certainly helped clear my acne, that's for sure.

Thanks for the memories, Bethy old girl.

I've now decided what I want for my next A2K
Birthday. I'll have a "Here's a photo of me to Ellpus, when I'm dressed
up as Marilyn Monroe/Jane Russell " thread, please.

Gus need not take part, of course.

in spite of all that

and that

and well that

___


don't get frostbit on your bits eh