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Fri 24 Nov, 2006 01:07 pm
Quote:MAN FARTS - 5 DIE
Dover, MA -
"I think its something to do with his stomach.." was the last thing that 911 dispatcher Carol Quandt heard before the loud explosion that ended her call with a local Dover resident.
At 5:15pm half a city block exploded killing 5 people and seriously wounding 15. The explosion was not caused by any gas leak or natural disaster but from a severe rectal build-up.
Dennis Edwards, a local PAOD (Phat-Asses-of-Dover) member, and a Dover Elementary PTA member was killed by a self inflicted anal explosion also killing his wife and 2 children, and there pet Dog fluffy. Apparently Dennis was eating refried beans for days, left-overs from his oldest son's high school graduation reception, and had been complaining about sever stomach cramps.
His wife Norma called the paramedics at 5:13pm to dispatch an ambulance but it was too late. At 5:15pm Dennis could no longer hold himself and exploded.
A memorial service is planned for Thursday night at the Bethony Lutheran Church. Funeral plans have not yet been announced.
Bill Sheppard, Edward's neighbor, looks through what was once his front door.
Ah- -yeah.
Actually, I read a purportedly true story one time, about a man who ate copious quantities of cabbage and beans. In the night, he passed so much gas, it replaced all the air, and he suffocated.
I hate when that happens! The poor dog!
Nope, but nice try! :wink:
Dover is one of the high income towns in MA. There are some insane homes there.
There's a vacancy now, apparently.
blacksmithn wrote:There's a vacancy now, apparently.
Likely a do-it-yourselfer.
Bring your hammer, some nails and lots of air freshener.
It's a good thing he's wasn't a smoker as well.
McTag, that link is hilarious!
"When I woke up, my penis and scrotum were burning like hell"
If you can die from farting, you could die from CRAMPS!
www.menwithcramps.com
lol
It's a bum rap. The dog did it.
No, it wasn't these 5 that died, but that Philip is a gas! If you take a look at each of their faces, you'll know just what he did and there isn't anymore needed to be said.
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