Shoplifter caught with shrimp in his pants

I was more intrigued by your headline than by the story itself, Reyn. Shrimp in his pants? Hmmm...

Is that a shriveled little pink shrimp in your pants or are you just unhappy to see me?

he sounds like a fishy character to begin with

Fishy, yes, shewolf. He'll be weighed in the scales of justice.

He'll probably clam up about the recipe for the shrimp..

You guys are on a roll!

These anchovy postings are addictive...


but where are the capers?

Thanx for not being shellfish and sharing the capers, Osso.

I once knew a guy had crabs in his pants.

I once saw a woman (a regular customer in our shop - about 70 years old and very wealthy) faint in one of the aisles, one hot summers day.

When staff attended to her, they found she had a packet of frozen chicken portions hidden under her hat.

Now, there's a funny coincidence! I once knew a young fellow who worked as a security guard in a large supermarket. He told this story: he and a store clerk saw a man walking down one of the aisles, with blood seeping down his cheek from under his hat. They immediately assumed that he had banged into something and was in need of some first aid. Afraid of a lawsuit against the store (quite a common occurrence in the States), they rushed him into the manager's office although the man kept insisting he was perfectly fine and needed no help. They sat him down, gingerly removed his hat and found under it . . .a slowly thawing porterhouse steak, nipped from the freezer.

We also suspected her of having things stuffed down her drawers, as she walked funny when taken to the staffroom to recover.

Nobody had the courage to ask her about it, though.

I once stole a roll of paper towels by pushing it down the front of my pants. Everyone in town knew me and no one suspected a thing.

Weren't they suspicious of the fact that you were showing no obvious signs of leakage, Gus?

I had a funnel cleverly hidden inside where the leakage dripped into my socks.

But good insight on your part.

The thing is, the guy's photo (poor sap) in the thread photo looks to be one of those "can you caption this?" flicks...

Gustav

That was exciting, Jane. Thank you.

Lucky they didn't question Gus about it - he might have come unravelled.



I thought he looked like Bruce Willis doing a promo for 'Die Hard".