Women's buying habit

I don't actually shop that often -- maybe once a month for a sweep at one store or another, and then I don't always buy anything.

Sozlet likes shopping for clothes for herself (for a short time), but gets aggressively bored shopping for anything else, so I don't usually shop with her. It's something I'll do occasionally when she's at school or when she's doing something with E.G.

As for having enough "stuff", it so varies. For example, when I started my job in L.A. I had no professional clothes, just college-kid clothes, and I had to build up a professional wardrobe. So I shopped often back then, as I had a tight budget but really needed this stuff (I was very young, but had to project enough authority to get my program off the ground). I went to a lot of thrift stores and resale stores and flea markets, assembled a really very nice wardrobe for a pittance. Lots of time, very little money.

Then, once I had a good solid professional wardrobe I quit and had a baby, and all of these silk suits and high heels became utterly impractical. (I kept the nicer ones though so I don't have to do another go-round when I do re-enter the work force.) My college-kid stuff was long gone and/or didn't fit anymore, so I had to build up a new wardrobe of stay-at-home mom stuff. That also took a while.

Then a couple of years ago I decided that since the kid was out of the spit-up stage and didn't need to be carried everywhere I could get back into higher heels and more skirts and nicer fabrics, feel more like myself again.

Right now I'm in a pretty good place (until I move down a couple of sizes, anyway, we'll see), and don't buy much for myself. I recently bought a couple of tank tops for cheap at Eddie Bauer outlet (colors I wanted and didn't have), and an outfit at H&M to update things a bit (olive skirt with zippers and cool details, white with olive voile fitted short-sleeved button-down cotton shirt). That's about it in the past several months, clothes-wise. Usually I set out to buy things to coordinate with an item that I found for cheap and loved but don't have anything to wear it with, or to keep things up to date.

The bargain-hunting doesn't always work. I bought a pair of sandals about five years ago that were a bargain, but had terrible soles, just foam bricks, not comfortable on long walks. So starting about 3 years ago I looked for replacement sandals -- I wanted something really comfortable and nice enough to wear with skirts. Searched and searched and searched, no go. Finally paid a lot more than I hoped to at an online shoe store a couple of months ago -- something like 30% off, but still $70 -- and they're perfect, really happy with them. Again, though, that's just my second pair of sandals in 5 years, and I only own those two.



I look at things carefully to consider a lot of aspects -- construction, fabric, durability, fit, color, style, and as you say whether the last two fit with other items I have. As Osso says, especially at resale/ thrift stores there may be a not-obvious deal-breaker; a stain in the armpit, a tear in the back, waist in a weird place, things like that.

Also, while I'm looking I'm often doing calculations, like "that costs ___, I don't want to spend more than ___ today, I think I want to get that other thing, do I want this more than the other thing?, I can't buy both." Or, "does that pink have too much peach in it to go with the skirt I have in mind?" Or, if buying FOR someone, "what color is their dining room again?" Etc.[/quote]



I don't really think of the looking AT an object instead of looking FOR it as being most of the fun, although it can be I guess in terms of "Is this actually as perfect as it seems... omigosh it actually seems to be that perfect... what a find!"

I also like just looking at how things are made when they're really clever. I've definitely closely examined a garment and how it was constructed and then gone home and made a version myself. :-)

Camden Lock!!! Oh, that was so great!! One of my favorite purchases of all time there, a lovely chocolate-brown wool fitted jacket from the 40's with silk lining and beautiful details, haggled down to 5 pounds. Oooh, love that jacket.

My first REAL bargain was a genuine Ben Sherman shirt, for about a third of the price they went for in the shops.

I was 16 and skinny, but wanting to impress the girls, and a Ben Sherman shirt at that time, was the height of cool.

I rushed home from the market, took it out of its packaging and found that I couldn't fit my arms down the sleeves. It was obviously a reject, or counterfeit, so I took it back the following Saturday.

He wasn't there (surprise surprise). A good lesson learnt, at an early age.

I stole my older brother's Ben Sherman for the date that evening. It was a bit big, but boy, was I cool!

I'm not the right person to answer, Chai, I don't hold things up and stare that long...

Though I did stare at various southwestern-themed tin framed mirrors at a shop this week - am remodelling the small bathroom, with various weird constraints to it turning out wonderfully.

I did pick up and put down about eight mirrors (there were twenty or more varieties and sizes of mirrors). They were all pretty gaudy, which was at first sort of a plus, and then I decided none were right, guess why, too gaudy, even for me.

Still, with all that mirror holding, I didn't separate each from its stack hold it up all that long... let's say 20 seconds max.

Did it have a packet of nylons in the pocket? And a bar of American candy?

I think it may have been my Mums, if it did.

There ya go, Soz....just to get you all nostalgic.

http://www.camdenlock.net/

Yeah, I'm not actually much of a pick-up-and-examine type -- my eye glides over things pretty quickly, and if I pick it up I can usually figure out if I'm interested within a very short time. IF I do, though...

Lord E, nostalgia indeed. I need to get back to London, looks like.

Well, I have this friend that does that "Staring" thing...she drives me nutts.

WHEN she was able to talk me into going to the Mall with her, which WAS about once every TWO YEARS..lol, its usually ended with me being totally aggitated....which is why I hate that place, and hate going with her shopping...I don't now!

She'll say.."I just have to run to Sears...would you please go?"

"Umm..Sears only, huh?"

"Yea"

YEA RIGHT...she'll park at the opposite end of the Mall, two miles away (exageration there) and we'll spend 1/2 day making it to Sears, because she has to stop and STARE at everything in-between. Then end up getting to Sears to find that she doesn't want what they have, having to walk all the way back through the mall to five other stores that we have already been in, to gather up 500 dollars worth of clothing that she will never wear...and I tote the bags...while she holds things up and STARES!

No thank you!

Fridays is my "shopping day", I have friend that goes with me. WE shop alike. We hit what store we need to hit, gather what we need to gather and head out. We'd prefer to eat lunch somewhere, where someone is serving US...and then we head home...done deal!

I don't necessarily like to shop, although I don't hate being in hardware or electronic stores.

Can't afford anything, so that settles that.

Can't drink / hate alcohol.

Cars are tranportation.

One more thing.....I hate sports. Any and all sports.

What's that make me?

I haven't gone shopping WITH anyone in forever. I liked it before I became deaf, but I can't shop (look around) and talk at the same time, and I hate the start-stop-start of trying to do both. For all my enjoyment of shopping, I don't like to waste my time, and can usually case a joint pretty efficiently if I'm able to use my eyes without interruption.

Tico, nice points, especially about middle-aged women and attention. I know that the Gap's new venture for 35+, Forth & Towne, places a lot of emphasis on that personal attention as a specific branding/ selling point.

One of whatever I am. Science will decide sooner or later.

Next time you're over, Soz, I'll go shopping with you. I don't like talking when I shop, I just get lost in my meanderings.
If I spot something interesting, I'll just tap you on the shoulder and point... unless it's something that I want for myself, that is. Then I'll just rugby tackle you out of the way, and grab it before you get up off the floor.

oh yeah, you know where I'm coming from shivers...I think (respectfully) that my question really could never get answered, because, well, it's like such 2 different cultures...the words can be said to explain, but it's not really perfectly translated.

It's not literally "picking things up" literally, it's just this whole thing that makes shivers and me think "What the HELL are you doing, let's go!"

Am I right shivers?

I learned my lesson long ago to shop for clothes alone....

OH! I know, like shivers friend in sears....You'll be in a store and if you're with a friend that's a shopper browser.....he/she will show you whatever and say "isn't that cute"?

"Yeah"

"Oh, and this one...this is cute"

"yeah, it is"

"Wow, this one has parts that move"

"yeah"

"this one move, but I think I like the blue color better"

"uh huh"........


You're trying to be nice, since this IS your friend and all....and inside, while not mad or anything, but it's like

"are we going to look at every single one of those blessed ceramic dashunds or what.....yes, apparantly we are...."

I can't stand shopping. Hmm.

Amen Sista'!!!!!

Thats what I'm talking about!!!!!!!

Drives me completely insane!!

My degree of shopping is going, getting there, getting it done, and getting the hell out!

I don't want to spend all day at the makeup counter while some twit explains the differences in foundations...(I know those things), and I don't want to spend all day watching someone try on clothes and wanting to know whether those jeans make her ass look fat or not? lol

This makes me think of my SIL and my shopping experience with her years ago, that broke me as well..lol

Picture...the day after Thanksgiving...Wal-Mart, before they had the 24/7 stores, uhhumm, 300 women packed into the opening and surrounding area waiting to get in, I was among them. The doors open, there is shoving, pushing, some clawing...my thought at the time was.."OMG, I'm one of THEM..lol, WTH am I doing?"

Took me about 18 years to go the 2nd time, which was this past Thanksgiving. Same scenario, early morning, hundreds are packed in and around the aisles in Wal-Mart...center aisles are draped in black plastic...store employee's are guarding those areas...

The bell went off, the fight was on.......literally.

Never Again!

I used to be a seller in a flea market a couple of years back. I hated it when I had "customers" (mostly women - sorry) that would literally pick up everything. They would say phrases like:

"Isn't that cute!"

"That's handy!"

"Very practical."

"I love it."

"That's perfect!"

And then......walk away without buying nada!!!

[pulls hair out]

Then, of course, I'd have to re-arrange the table the way I had it and neaten all the items up again.

Years back, when I was living in Fla. I drove out to Texas to check on the house I had here (the one I live in now) and to see how things were going with my tenant. She was a nice person, more of an acquaintance than a friend.

As long as I was here, I thought I'd take day and go down to this brandy new shopping outlet place about 30 miles south of Austin. I was thinking since I drove, I could buy some clothes and space wouldn't be a problem. Actually, I think there was something specific (not clothes) I was looking for, so I had that in mind.

Anyway, my tenant, Kim, said "I'll go with you!" (oh no I thought I'd get to spend the day alone). She was a real extrovert and I'm sure she thought she was saving me from a fate worse than death.

Sigh….We get down there, and there's something like 75 stores. In my mind though, I could cut out all the childrens stores, jewelry, mens, etc.

Since I wasn't familiar with the place, I said….let's park here on the end so we'll remember where we're parked. The big semicircle of stores started there.

Kim walks into the first store, a china shop…well that's nice, I thought she just wanted to looks at some plates quick…..WRONG! Finally I asked her if she wanted to buy china, because she was looking at some really extravagant stuff…."No, I'm just looking…aren't these pretty?" The next store was handbags and wallets…..you guessed it….

By now, an hour has gone by….Next was a clothing store….Kim was a big girl, and it was one of those shops made for skinny people. Didn't stop her from "looking" though….Finally went into the 4th store and she picked out some clothes to try on….Honestly, between you and me…they were ghastly, and there was no way she had any business trying them on. Then started the "How does this look phase"….At first, I was just trying to be polite and non-commital, but she started taking so damn long over one shirt I finally said, "kim, to be honest, I don't think any of this really suites you, but that's just me." Well, it took her another 20 minutes of trying stuff on to figure that out…..left with nothing, now it's 2 ½ hours from arrival…

As we walked the 10 feet to the next door, I finally asked her…"Kim, are you planning on going into every single store?"

"Well, yeah. Why?"

Because there's dozens of stores here, we can't get to every one, and we haven't gone into one yet where I needed anything, and you didn't either!

You're probably thinking I should have said, "I'll meet you back here in 2 hours", but this was pre-cell phone days, and in her mind 2 hours would have meant 4 or 5.

Anyway, by that time, my feet hurt, I felt completely cheated out of an entire day and just wanted to go have lunch somewhere.

I wouldn't have had the patience to wait out your friend either, Chai Tea..
The few friends I would ever think of shopping with do understand time, and we never - or not often - just trail around with each other, yikes.

We've had the same discussion re art galleries. A lot of us like our own space for looking at art. I'm not big on talking at movies either.





I'm very sympathetic re the problem of people saying things like "isn't this cute?", though I suppose I do the equivalent once in a while. I have decades long memories of a friend in my teens and twenties saying things like "isn't this wonderful?" It's so wonderful! It's wonderful, isn't it!

Nowhere to run after those words..

Thinking about it, I guess most people I pal around with now will just say what they themselves think about something... anything, be it a type of hot dog or a boutique or a mountain view.

Chai...

Pat on the back for having to put up with that!!!

I have been through that, it stinks to the high heavens to have to endure every freakin' store in a one mile radius for nothing at all.

And those games of.."Isn't this cute? Aww, look at that!!! " GRRR..

"Yea..sure, I just pee'd myself over the complexity of patterns in that size 2 skirt, that isn't going to fit on your size 18 ass, but whatever!! If you think you can squeeze those hips into it big momma, I'm game, buy the bitch and lets go!" (Thats what I really really want to say!!!)

The last time I went clothes shopping was about a month ago. I run through Wal-Mart to the mens section, picked up 4 different colored tank tops, and run like hell through womens to gather up sports bras, zipped through the groceries and gathered up pic-nic supplies, and lit out of there like my tail was on fire........poof! Done!

I'm such a fashionista in the summertime!!! LOL

I do clothes shop, but its when I know I need something nice...I leave out, have in mind what I'm looking for and go find it. I don't have to spend two days in three different towns to get it either. If that doesn't work, I get online and find it....

Jeff Foxworthy on the difference between men and women shopping:

A guy stands outside a store and says "I'm cold"...walks in the store and buys the first coat he sees...then walks outside and says "I'm not cold"

A woman touches and feels 30 coats and says "that's cute...I hope it fits"...etc...it's like she;s leaving her pheromones, warning other women not to buy that coat.