Couple Sells Candles That Smell Like Jesus

"Kitty litter" mmmmmmm.


Am I the only one pondering the state of hygiene back in the Day?

not at all....

Armpits of Despair...... great candle name...

He must've smelled like a rose, rising from that tomb....

An imponderable question, for sure! One that I was thinking of when I posted this story. :wink:

Mmmmmm.... Barbeque Savior....

scratch and sniff samples available?

Smoked white meat

Medium-dark, by some accounts.

It says which part it smells like. His essence. Haven't you people ever read a romance novel? It's code, I'm telling you.

Hope he didn't go blind, filling those candles with his essence.

He probably got a little chafed, though.

I've managed to save quite a bit of money, though. People often enter a room I'm in and say, "Jesus! What's that smell?"

How'bout a sented candle for the ladies called "Man Sweat".

Spunk Gunk

nut sweat

smegma

Hmmmm...given he was sort of genetically engineered, and never designed to reproduce, I don't think he HAD that sort of essence!


And no, I HAVEN'T ever read a romance novel....I had to go back to Dr Strangelove, and I am now finding this thread VERY disturbing.



All I can think of is the "Funky Spunk" episode of Sex and the City.


And just what, exactly, is supposed to be going on on this post Revelations world that anybody even KNOWS what his essence smells like!!!

I too wondered what exactly Jesus' essence smells like.....armpit? Butt sweat? Dirty toe cheese? I mean, he was a man living in a very hot climate so naturally...

And then I wondered, how did they obtain this essence?

Was it given freely and has just been stored away for all these years waiting to be made into a sellable form?

Did it rain down from heaven and was captured in a Bell jar to be added to wax for candles?

Did Judas steal the lint from his belly button (aside from being a traitor anyway), call it the Holy Grail and assign a secret group of people to watch it forever? Did they recently put it in a centrifuge to extract any "essence" that might be clinging to the fuzz in order to make these candles?

Are these people the last children of Sion?

How about renaming the candle Lord Lard?

Introducing the new line of provocative scented candles for those speciall evenings alone brought to you by Shewolf available at walmart soon. (berry white playing in back round)

Easy street here we come!!!!!

Our boats finaly come in. I can't wait to quit my job tomorrow.

I'll talks to my peeps in East L.A.. I'll have those Old mexican ladies working the tripple shift.

sweat shop !
woohooo!

Now there's an idea thats stupid and contagious