Please help! and try to understand.

I have put this here in an honest attempt to get it viewed by as many of you as possible. I know that since I have become a member of this site at various times I have made quite an ass out of myself and seemed like I am preaching. I have a story to explain this and apologize.
almost two mth's ago i went and saw a Psychiatrist, that was truly amazed by my I.Q, and what we talked about, so he put me on a drug called Neruontin to see if I could bring my intelligence out more. He put me on 2400 Mg's, and when it started to work. I became a researcher of resarcher's, going almost to the brink of insanity. I found myself in a room with books stacked a mile high in every area of the room, I started to research on the net, I lost my relaxed spirit. I could not stop. My eating turned to **** I was up night and day. I feel like at times my head is going to pop. I saw my family Physician and he told me to just take more klonipin to settle down. Though I am beginning to believe that I understand how Nietzsce must have felt before he had his breakdown. I did not mean to preach, or to conflict anyones personal views. All I wanted was a safe place to fit in like you all want, and I think that I have diseased your atompshere without intending to. Also that is why when I write it is not even me anymore, and when I post things they come of the wrong way. Please forgive me and not view me as a troll. I personally could not help it. I wish I could have joined this forum before all this took place and you could of got a chance to see the real me. I could go on and on.. though I think no matter what most of you will still not let me in. Sorry for my preaching. sincerely, M.G