Well this is a bit awkward...

you can probably guess my vote

mine as well

So do you two want a photo of Mo, a bag of cookies (really good cookies - we went all out this year - Mo is getting whiz-bang in the kitchen), and a jar of special holiday bubbles?

I might have some extras.

You have to ask?

Deeeeeeeeeelighted is how I'd be.

How's Mr. B on gettin' his hands dirty?
I think I'd just like a thumbprint from each of you on my card.

Mr. B is positively filthy!

I'll just stop him when he comes in the door.

Honestly, I wish this stuff was easier. I look forward to the day when the adoption is complete and I can consider my future in British Columbia, or France or.....

....consider not having to be thinking about the best way to sign a holiday card without pissing anyone off.

Okay. Wait.

Did my brother vote in the poll without posting?

ok - so, like, you know your Santa protocol thread ... well, yes you do

there are probably also lots of regional card protocols

I'm used to seeing cards signed The Mom, The Dad, kids' names or The X family.

So, if I wasn't getting thumbprints from your house, I'd expect the card to be signed

Boomer, Mr. B's first name and Mo <often some kiddie scribble instead of a signature>

I have been remiss in the Santa protocol thread. I really need to check it. Chocolate biscotti got in the way and I am behind.

That is how we signed every card that went out this year. Then I got to the bio-family cards and it just seemed..... presumptious?.... inflamitory?.... I don't know..... f**k youish?

I'm probably being over-cautious but this upcoming year is big and I don't want to offend or alienate anyone.

Truthfully, if I didn't want to give gifts to Mo's little sisters and keep the channels open to them, I probably wouldn't have worried about gifts and delivery and what-not.

What do you normally do?


I'd do that.

Normally, things going out to my family are signed:

boomerang, Mr. B and Mo.

Things going out to Mr. B's family are signed:

Mr. B, boomerang and Mo.

So things going out to Mo's other family should be:

Mo, boomerang and Mr. B?

Am I being stupid for fretting about the "message" that the signature could send?

Umm...is this the first time presents have gone to Mo's family?

The reason I suggested sticking to what you normally do with his family is just BECAUSE this is a key year.....thus I suggested keeping things as usual as possible.

There really isn't any "normal", dlowan.

I need to get out my journals to remember exactly but it seems....

Mo was born January 2001.

He spent Christmas 2001 and 2002 with his mom and dad.

He moved in with us in January 2003.

Christmas 2003 was crazy with everyone wanting to see and be with him. Fights, fights, fights.

That year I didn't give anyone anything.

Christmas 2004 his mom and her boyfriend wanted Mo to spend the night with them. He did but he came home early. Dad nowhere around. His parents also AWOL so a bit easier.

That year I gave mom and her family photos of Mo.

Now here we are. Dad nowhere but his parents back in the picture (a good thing, really). Mom and family flimsier in their connections (a good thing, really).

I have presents for his sisters and a photo and cookie bag for everyone else.

This is the year that could set "usual" up for following years.

I want to be responsible without being doting if that makes any sense at all.

Oooooookaaaaaaay.

First time.

I'd go with Mo, then Boomer and Mr Boomer under.

That seems a little out of the blue? Welcome!

I say don't agonize and just put Mo's name on the card. He can represent the whole family.

Done. Next....

Hmmm. We usually just signed "Cub" for our oldest when he gave gifts to his Mom and her boyfriend or husband.

She knew I was the one that picked it out or took him to pick it out or helped him make it. But, it was from him. He wrapped it. He got the joy of giving.

Not sure if it's different for your situation, but that's how we handled it.

Oh Reyn. Don't fuel my escape to a foreign country dreams. Early on in the Mo "situation" I considered that in a serious way. The legal aspects held me back but I still consider it when things it weird.

I think I would love BC. Someday your doorbell may ring and you'll find a strange woman at the door.....

That is kind of what I'm thinking, squinney - they know; they have to know.

But I also think it might be time to establish some.... some.... credentials?..... authority?.... usness?......

Could a signiture even represent such importance to people who are so careless?

Are my concerns addressed to a completely different demographic?

Dlowan's "Oooooookaaaaaaay." is exactly where I'm at.

Hmm, what will I say to my wife?

You'll say "Please allow me to introduce my friend who is hiding from the American police. She means no harm and I think you'll like her."

We need a goddamn blue frog downunder.