Good Manners = Common Sense?

I can't stand it when you open the door for some one and suddenly, a clown car lets out and you have 50 people streaming through the door without so much as a "thank you" and no one grabs the door from you and you stand there...waiting....patiently...for a spot....to open....up maybe...this time....oh, no, old lady, can't go now.....maybe this....oh, no, woman with an infant....can't slam on them....

hehehe

yeah, that's good

I'm imagining you thinking "OK, so who CAN I slam the door on? Oh look, a mime! Perfect!"





Oh - another cell phone this, DONT use it while going to the bathroom, WAY too much information.

.

Chai tea, good thread. I wonder if you saw Montana's thread about a party she had, inviting the people from work. She cooked like crazy, cleaned, really was set up for a great party and very few showed up. Not one of them telephoned to say they weren't coming. This seems to be happening more often as the years go by.

I share each of the peeves mentioned. The cell phone is a biggy for me. Like you, I do not want to hear someone else's business, even if I'm not trying to have a conversation. The rings are really irritating.

There is one peeve that really wouldn't be considered impolite--using a cell phone in a beautiful place, the woods or the beach. I think they should be banned when natural beauty is there to be appreciated--quietly. OK, so I'm a little curmudgeonly about things like that.

Basically, that lovely word "empathy" seems to have become obsolete.

One other thing...when a good turn is done, like letting a person move ahead of you if they have only one or two things. (I agree, Reyn, about the person who just shoves his way in), the other person is appreciative and also relaxes just a little. Have any of you seen this reaction? A small favor really seems to make the blood pressure go down and reminds the person receiving the favor to be kinder.

I think this is related to keeping a neat and nicely decorated place of business. There is a rest stop on the New Jersey turnpike that used to be horrible, especially the rest rooms. About a year after I had stopped there, I had to stop again--there were little vases of plastic flowers placed by the sinks and it had been cleaned. The plastic flowers were colorful, cheerful and had the effect of making the people using the restroom to take better care of it. The toilets weren't as messy, the sinks weren't as dirty.

Thoughtfulness and just a little fixing up can make all the difference in the world. This was a place where the toilet paper seemed to be strewn all over the floor and paper towels were left on the counters along with pools of water. What a delight. I left feeling so much better--my blood pressure, I'm sure, was lower after leaving.The place was decorated very cheaply, but with thoughtfulness. I consider this a form of empathy. A tired traveler cringes when entering a public bathroom. I was amazed. What a difference!

People who talk, during a movie , about what is going ON in the movie.. and loudly give thier arm-chair advice about the stars/ actors next move..




then cheer when they are right..

I always put my cell phone on vibrate when going to a restaurant, store, pretty much any public place. It's only on "ring" when I'm at home or in the car.

What I don't understand is people getting peeved from others talking on cell phones(and I don't mean movies/restaurants). What's the difference if you're hearing someone on a cell phone vs. if they're talking to someone standing next to them?

My biggest pet peeve is ignorant drivers. They think because they're in a car they can be complete asshats, in their protective cage. 90% of those people would never flip you off to your face.

I'm guilty there too though, I can get a bit aggressive.

Slappy, the vibrating part sounds interesting...

You pervert.

So I wear it in the front of my underwear, so what?

[quote="Chai
OH!!!!! Here's a pet peeved for me......

When you're talking to someone on the phone, and they've got their TV, radio whatever just blasting away.

When you talking on the phone, TURN OFF the TV!!!

It just sounds SO trailer trashy, like you can't decide if I'm important enough to devote your attention to....

[/quote]


I must admit that one of my biggest pet peeves is the use of the term trailer trash or white trash. I was called white trash as a child and it hurts like hell. I know a number of people - fully respectable people - who live in trailers, some on this site, and to judge these, or any, people as trash makes me extremely angry.

Slappy, sweetie, I can't think of a better place to wear it--might as well get some enjoyment out of the damned thing.

J_B, you are right about trailer trash. Trailer parks are a good way to have a home in a decent neighborhood. They have provided a good life for millions of people. They all aren't trashy, just poor.

You know, they aren't always poor either.
Was watching a show on one of those lifestyle channels on sunday, and there are trailer parks where units cost a couple of HUNDRED of THOUSANDS of dollars.

Hey ladies, I did my time in a trailer, a single wide, bottom of the line model plunked down in the middle of 5 acres of worthless land that was covered with palmetto bushes, scrub pines, and no paved roads for a few miles. When you finally did hit asphalt, you had to drive over 25 miles to get to the nearest town, which was full of people who still called blacks "coloreds" or "nigras".
I didn't think of myself as trailer trash, but I knew that's how I was living, and wouldn't have begrudged anyone for calling me that.

Seriously, JB, sorry if that term offends you, I do know what you mean.
I'm only the 2nd generation in my family born into this country, and have listened to more than my share of "pollack" jokes.

Sorry, I apologize.

That wasn't very mannerly of me, was it?

I think from now on I'll call them "ill mannered boobs" or IMB for short.

How's that?

I think that trailers are associated with "trash" because that's the way it is in many, many parks and we don't remember seeing the beautiful trailer park. We remember the broken down, crap all over, nasty toothless people trailer parks. Where I live, they are cheap and often dirty.

However, they've come a LONG way and now they can be just like a regular house! I think that generalizing anyone is wrong. Not everyone who lives in a trailer is poor or dirty or trashy. Not everyone who lives in a house isn't.

Here's an easy one. People politely asking the same question over and over. I said no the first time. Don't ask me again. I don't care if you're using your party manners. You're annoying me. You're pushy. I'm starting to really dislike you - and the next time you ask, I might say no just because you kept bothering me before.

<not you, Reyn, the fictional asker>

There's a particular variant of this that really drives me mad. Has to people inviting me to their homes. By the time they're done asking politely for the xth time I'm ready to go to their house and break their best vase. And I'm not really that kind of person.

OHHHHH..... I get it now.

That like the person who says goodbye and then DOESN'T LEAVE.

And they'll keep telling you they're going.

Okay then, Bye bye. Go. Leave. No one is holding you back.

My boss does that.
Finally, one day after she said she's was leaving no less than 17 times, I just blurted out "no you're not"

She hadn't even realized she had been saying that.

Fortunately, we have the kind of relationship that I can call her on this.

I told her, "new rule, you are not allowed to say you are leaving more than twice, before you actually go"

It has helped somewhat.

Anyway - anybody out there do that?
Why do you do that?

Say goodbye, vaya con queso, and leave.

Hah, I would have been tempted to say, "There's the door, what's your hurry?" Naturally, that would have been quite rude. Like JImmy Carter whho lusted in his heart, I too have lusted to be plain old rude. I have a few times and it felt wonderful!!!

Well, first of all............................
I don't think Common Sense is very common anymore!
Most people need to read a self help book to tell them what to do. Why is that?