Destination Weddings! (How do you feel about them?)

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I've been mulling over this for some time now. Here's my issue.

Many years ago I dated a girl and we broke but remained the best of friends. Shortly afterwards she started dating a guy and got pregnant. Had a beautiful little girl and several years into that girl's life her dad was shot and killed. Being still good friends with my ex I helped her raise that little girl. She was too young to really remember her dad so she grew up calling me daddy, even though she knew I wasn't. I was / am honored. She's spent many nights at my house, spent time with my family, and even gone on vacations with me. I love her as my own. I now have my own biological daughter who is a few years younger than her and they grew up as sisters.

My oldest now has 3 kids of her own and they all call me granddaddy. The oldest is now 13 yrs old. Anyway, she, my daughter, has been dating a guy for a number of years and they had their own place together. A few months ago they were struggling financially and had to leave the apt and move to a hotel. He then asked her to marry him. Here's my dilemma. They decided to have a destination wedding. They started out wanting to go to somewhere like Turks and Cacos or someplace like that but with money being tight for them and not many of her family members really being able to afford it they settled on Vegas. I guess I was looking forward to walking my oldest down the aisle to her intended husband but with a destination wedding my wife and I just couldn't afford the trip. They left for Vegas a few days ago and the wedding is actually tonight at some wedding chapel there. Here's the thing, she sent everyone a like to watch the ceremony online but we're on the east coast and with that being Vegas time (8:30 PM) that puts it at 11:30 PM our time. I doubt I will still be up by then to watch the ceremony since I have work tomorrow.

Don't get me wrong, people can do whatever they want. I'm not knocking what anyone does. I guess I'm a little upset with the way things are going. You left your apartment due to financial reasons and ended up in a hotel but want to do a destination wedding knowing those people who love you probably won't be able to attend. Then with the time difference it'll be too late for most people to stay woke to watch it given their jobs the next day. Yeah, I was looking forward to walking my oldest down the aisle so that sort of rubs me the wrong way too.

Why do people have destination weddings knowing that most of the people who love and care about them probably won't be able to attend? Why not have a small ceremony at home so everyone can attend then do Vegas as the honeymoon if they so choose.

What are your thoughts on destination weddings? Yeah, I know it's about what the bride and groom wants but . . . . . .

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@Barry2021,

I can't answer that question - destination weddings are still a fad, I guess.

What are you getting them for a wedding gift?

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@Mame,

Haven't really thought about a gift yet.

I just wonder if couples think about the cost to everyone when they plan a destination wedding. They've gotta take a few days off work, blow some vacation time going to a place they probably wouldn't have picked and then that's all on their dime. Would I want to use MY vacation time and spend MY money to go somewhere just to watch two people get married who could have gotten married at a local park or even in a church or wedding chapel in our area on a Sat and not cost anyone anything other than a day and a wedding gift. And even with a destination wedding does the couple still expect a gift too?

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@Barry2021,

Why don't you ask her?

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@Barry2021,

Given that you couldn't attend the wedding perhaps the question of a present too is moot.

I tryst they had a lovely wedding.

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@Barry2021,

I think it all comes down to the "dream wedding". Also, destination wedding venues have these programs where the bride and groom and fees are waived if a certain number of guests stay at the hotel, so while these weddings can be expensive for the guests, they might be free for the couple.

I know people need their sleep, but I would definitely stay up to see the wedding of my daughter, even if I had to take vacation the next day.

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@Barry2021,

Destination weddings seem like a good way to keep the attendee list short.

Anyway, stay up, watch the wedding, figure out what a reasonably price, reasonably practical gift is and wish them a happily ever after.

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@fobvius,

fobvius wrote:

Given that you couldn't attend the wedding perhaps the question of a present too is moot.

I tryst they had a lovely wedding.

[youtube]https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=LVtgPQkdkMs[/youtube]

Yes it was a nice ceremony. The wedding chapel streamed it online so I got to see it. Dow down side of that was the time difference. Since they were in Vegas and I'm on the east coast there's a 3 hour time difference. So 8:30 Vegas time was 11:30 home time.

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@ehBeth,

I worked at a high dollar wedding venue in Austin, Greene Pastures - an historic estate and the home of Yellow Dog Democrats.

Our weddings were never under $30,000 for no more than 250 guests.

Our policy was: 50% non refundable deposit down, net due at the reception.

In 2000, we had a wedding set for the second Saturday in June, very desirable date for a wedding. This party booked carried a deposit of over $30,000.

Two weeks before the wedding, the MiL came in and asked to cancel the date and asked for the deposit back, the bride and groom had an ugly breakup. We explained calmly and decisively, no. It was a major date and we would never be able to re-book another the way we want to book a wedding.

She said: Keep the date booked. And two weeks later we held the weeding ... with another groom. A lot of the guests were extremely confused about who the heck the groom was. Staff had a lot of fun conjecturing how that all played out.

I got some wedding stories, I gotta say.

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@bobsal u1553115,

Wow is all I can say! A wedding that soon with a different groom! Talk about executing Plan B. I imagine they were well acquainted with one another.

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