Seeing a man who’s still dealing with his ex

started talking to a man in December who’s wife had left him in July but didn’t move out till October and they have two kids. He was hesitant putting himself out there but thought he’d give it a go. I left my husband in April and have 4 kids. Anyway, we got along well over text, he was excited about me, would say things like it feels like we’ve know each other forever etc and was excited to meet. We met once between Xmas and New Years and both said we are looking for casual but am open to anything. We met again at his place on New Years and something clicked. We just connected. I stayed with him overnight a week later (we were both on holidays at the time). It was then that we started to develop feelings and he was the first to admit it, which gave me the guts to let down my walls and start to really get feelings for him. Since then; he went back to his very stressful job, and his ex started to make his life hard. He thinks she saw that he was happy living without her and would constantly pick fights then 2 weeks ago told him she had an affair, then took it back 🙄. His kids started suffering (he has them week on and week off and they are his world). That’s when he started to pull away from me. He told me he had strong feelings for me and is scared of getting hurt again and wants to slow things down but still doesn’t want to stop seeing me. But, he makes no effort to see me and most of the time makes excuses to not see me when I try to plan to see him (I live an hour away btw). And he only messages me if I message him first. I’m left hurt and confused because he tells me everything in his life is shitty atm and when I’m with him I make him happy, yet he’s pushing me away and it’s like when I’m not with him it’s out of sight out of mind, he can’t even factor me in because he can only concentrate of the crap he is dealing with. But, if he has feelings for me and I make him happy, why wouldn’t he want to see more of me? I found out that we had 1 night where neither of us had kids in a couple of weeks and suggested spending it together, and he told me that it’s his ex’s bday that weekend and the kids will probably want to do something as a family 😳. He said his ex told them when they split that they would still do sports and bdays etc as a family. Like seriously ? He can’t stand her at the moment but still willing to ditch me incase his kids want him to be with them on his ex’s birthday ??? He is a caring and genuine guy and I want to be with him and I’m willing to be patient but I’m left in the cold and feeling constantly rejected. The last time we spoke was over text 2 days ago when I asked if he was ok because he hadn’t replied to me from the night before when I actually told him I’d had a terrible week. And he said no he wasn’t good, too much on his mind and too many thoughts. I told him I’m here when he’s ready and to give me a call that night if he wanted to talk. He said thanks for the offer xx. . I haven’t heard anything since.