@Barry2021,
Barry2021 wrote: I just want her to be more attentive to these things. ....Link, I'm with you 1000%, I wouldn't want to miss these events no matter what.
This is the control part ....it is what you want..it is not what she wants.
It is one thing to say I like this or I want this...but it is different when you push want you want vs what someone else wants...even if what that person wants may appear to you to be selfish or uncaring.
Your wife is a grown adult and her choice to not attend these events may or may not impact your granddaughters future view of her. Your wife will need to live with these repercussions .
And like I said my husband did not work as hard as I did to make himself available for a!l these boring and not so boring events, I did risk my future career growth to do this but it was worth it to me. He did give in other ways ... Coaching where it worked in his schedule ... I did not judge him when he chose work over a boring event .... I recognize we each make choices for a variety of reasons
Your granddaughter is not suffering from attention...my opinion she will adore her grandpa and will thrive under his attention so no worries for her..her grandmother she will treat differently because of this .. There isn't anything wrong with it just simply people are different.
Look at this way you are likely to be her favorite.