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Breaking An Apartment Lease

 
 
nycdad
 
Reply Tue 28 Sep, 2021 01:39 am
I recently moved into an apartment with a former coworker who was kicked out of his brother's house. No reason why he was kicked has been given. I have been living in a room for most of my adult life and simply wanted to leave the room scene. So, when the opportunity to share an apartment came up, I jumped on it.

My roommate and I both signed a one year lease at $1400/month rent. He pays $700 and I pay $700. Utilities not included in the rent. The problem is that my roommate is extremely difficult to live with.

He decided to stop talking to me because I don't want to get a second job. I don't need a second job. He works two jobs by his own choice. I can pay all my bills working 40 hours per week. There is no communication at the apartment. As a result, it feels awkward for me to be there.

I no longer wish to be at the apartment. I am planning to leave the place this coming weekend at 3am. I want to escape from a very difficult and depressing situation. I know that we both signed a lease but I am not happy there anymore. My roommate completely ignores me.

Questions

1. The house owner does not have my SSN. She only has my name and phone number. I can easily change my phone number. What are the chances of the house owner finding me if I secretly leave the house, which means breaking the apartment lease?

2. The house owner and roommate do not know where I work and/or the name of the company I work for. The only mailing address on file in my state is a post office box. They also don't know where I am moving to. How can they possibly find me?

3. Do you, the reader, understand my situation? I am trying to prevent something worst from happening. Am I wrong for planning to secretly move out? What would you do? There is zero communication at the apartment. I dislike my roommate and the faker that he truly is. You say?

 
Frank Apisa
 
  2  
Reply Tue 28 Sep, 2021 04:09 am
@nycdad,
nycdad wrote:

I recently moved into an apartment with a former coworker who was kicked out of his brother's house. No reason why he was kicked has been given. I have been living in a room for most of my adult life and simply wanted to leave the room scene. So, when the opportunity to share an apartment came up, I jumped on it.

My roommate and I both signed a one year lease at $1400/month rent. He pays $700 and I pay $700. Utilities not included in the rent. The problem is that my roommate is extremely difficult to live with.

He decided to stop talking to me because I don't want to get a second job. I don't need a second job. He works two jobs by his own choice. I can pay all my bills working 40 hours per week. There is no communication at the apartment. As a result, it feels awkward for me to be there.

I no longer wish to be at the apartment. I am planning to leave the place this coming weekend at 3am. I want to escape from a very difficult and depressing situation. I know that we both signed a lease but I am not happy there anymore. My roommate completely ignores me.

Questions

1. The house owner does not have my SSN. She only has my name and phone number. I can easily change my phone number. What are the chances of the house owner finding me if I secretly leave the house, which means breaking the apartment lease?

2. The house owner and roommate do not know where I work and/or the name of the company I work for. The only mailing address on file in my state is a post office box. They also don't know where I am moving to. How can they possibly find me?

3. Do you, the reader, understand my situation? I am trying to prevent something worst from happening. Am I wrong for planning to secretly move out? What would you do? There is zero communication at the apartment. I dislike my roommate and the faker that he truly is. You say?




The answer to the question, "How can they possibly find me?" is...

...there is almost NO CHANCE THAT THEY WILL NOT BE ABLE TO FIND YOU.

You say you are trying to prevent anything worse from happening. Ummm...what you are planning is almost certain to result in something worse happening.

Just my take. Best you think this through MANY MORE TIMES before going through with it. Talk to your room-mate and attempt to negotiate a way to disengage.

You've managed to walk into a bad situation (apparently by not thinking things through beforehand)...and now are preparing to make things worse by not thinking things through beforehand.
Linkat
 
  3  
Reply Tue 28 Sep, 2021 07:23 am
@nycdad,
Welcome to the grown up world. You signed a legal contract and now you want to break it...not only break it but do something very childish and sneak away from it.

An adult way of handling a difficult situation is to meet it head on. You need to sit down with your roommate and put some parameters around your living situation. Talk with him on how you would like your living situation to be and allow him to talk about what he would like...and here is the big kicker...listen to each and try to find a compromise to meet in the middle. Write your own contract with your roommate and you each sign it. Another kicker you don't need to be best friends...you don't even need to be friends at all to be roommates you just need mutual respect.

If it still becomes unbearable then the next adult step is to talk with your landlord to see how you can mutually break the lease. He may be willing with some parameters depending on how easy it is to get tenents.

Sneaking out will only cause a bad situation to get worse as you will likely have an irate former roommate looking for you and an irate former landlord ...both if you are found could cause you much financial and personal grief.

Time to out your big boy pants on and handle the situation like an adukt.
0 Replies
 
jespah
 
  2  
Reply Tue 28 Sep, 2021 08:26 am
@nycdad,
nycdad wrote:

...

He decided to stop talking to me because I don't want to get a second job. I don't need a second job. ...My roommate completely ignores me....
So what?

Allow me to repeat myself.

So what?

Lots of people have roommates they don't talk to. Your roommate doesn't have to be your pal. There's nothing awkward about this unless you decide it has to be awkward. Being friendly is lovely, but you two can also cooexist in the space.

Same thing with his deciding you need a second job. It's none of his damned business.

Both of these things hinge on everyone paying the bills. If you can pay the bills, then your roommate's suggestion that you get a second job is misplaced and downright meddlesome. It's none of his business if you have any $ in your savings account.

Anyone's requirements for a roommate should be (and I've had plenty):
  • They can pay their fair share of rent, utilities, whatever has to be paid for
  • They don't make the place unlivable with dirty dishes and the like that attract vermin, or turn up music super-loud
  • If you're not a smoker and they are, they don't smoke inside
  • They don't potentially endanger your life by letting an abusive lover in, or dealing drugs on the premises
  • They buy their own food if you're not sharing, and they reimburse you if they eat yours (same with soap, shampoo, etc.)
  • They lock up the place when they're not there
And... that's about it.

Once again, for the cheap seats. You do not have to be pals. And often it's a better living situation if you aren't.
nycdad
 
  2  
Reply Mon 4 Oct, 2021 04:22 pm
@Frank Apisa,
Thank you, Frank. After talking to the Legal Aid Society in NYC, I've decided to live out the lease. Next year, I will make my departure, change my number and move on. My roommate is bipolar. I did not know this about him prior to moving into the apartment.
Mame
 
  1  
Reply Mon 4 Oct, 2021 05:46 pm
@nycdad,
Good for you. The less contact you have with him, the better. I know a couple of people diagnosed with bi-polar who don't take their meds. Be glad he's not talking to you because they're in an alternate reality.

How do you know he's bi-polar?
nycdad
 
  1  
Reply Mon 4 Oct, 2021 05:54 pm
@jespah,
After talking to the Legal Aid Society in NYC, I've decided to live out the lease. Next year, I will make my departure, change my number and move on. My roommate is bipolar. I did not know this about him prior to moving into the apartment.
0 Replies
 
nycdad
 
  1  
Reply Mon 4 Oct, 2021 05:57 pm
@Mame,
How do I know he's bipolar? He has a million personalities. He is what was once referred to as DR. JECKYLL AND MR. HIDE. After talking to the Legal Aid Society in NYC, I've decided to live out the lease. Next year, I will make my departure, change my number and move on. My roommate is bipolar. I did not know this about him prior to moving into the apartment.
Mame
 
  1  
Reply Mon 4 Oct, 2021 06:03 pm
@nycdad,
Maybe he's schizophrenic... at any rate, you have some challenges ahead. Good luck to you.
nycdad
 
  1  
Reply Tue 5 Oct, 2021 04:27 am
@Mame,
Thanks.
0 Replies
 
 

 
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