Quitting contacts

Reply Thu 18 Feb, 2021 06:40 am
I'm registered on such a site where I met one guy. He's like 3 years older, but I don't mind it. We were firstly texting there, and then we moved to Discord. We were just talking about usual stuff, nothing romantic or so. We were friends. I've had him on Discord for almost a year, but now we're not friends. We just text each other because we're used to it. But now I don't wanna text him anymore. Never more. Today he started insulting me for nothing. Or at least I don't know what I've done. He talked about my behaviour, but I really don't know anything. However, I don't find our conversations interesting anymore, so I wanna quit. But I'm afraid to tell him he should let me be, and if I block him or remove him from my friend list, he'll find out and use it against me. I'm also scared one day he'll be after me.
Also, I wanna leave also the site, but there are a few other people I love talking to. I don't feel good on that site, but I don't wanna leave them. And they won't probably let me text them on different sites.
I'm really desperate about this, because it's making me feel really bad, and I just can't go away and let them all be. Is there something I could do? Should I tell them all I'm leaving, or just secretely disappear from day to day?
Reply Thu 18 Feb, 2021 07:48 am
I would just leave - these are virtual friends - not real ones. If there is anyone you do feel you would like to have as a continued contact - can you send a personal message to them somewhere? Like on here we can send a personal message to them - they get it in their own inbox, but no direct contact to anything you have outside the forum. You could let them know another virtual place to meet up in.

For this weird guy - I just would "unfriend" him - completely stop contact. You have no obligation to him. As far as
if I block him or remove him from my friend list, he'll find out and use it against me.
How would he use it against you? Would you be in any danger? Does he know any of your personal contact information - like address? That would worry me. Anything else probably really doesn't matter. If he doesn't have any of your real personal identity then who cares if he comes after you on any type of site like Discord - that is not really who you are. And if you leave like you say you want to - even less of what he says matters and bonus - you leave you do not have to read any of it.

Long and short - if you do not feel good on this site - leave. You can go elsewhere and make new virtual friends. You do not need to say anything to anyone. But I would only tell others on there if you can do so privately and if you really trust them as you do not want to be followed.
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Reply Thu 18 Feb, 2021 07:53 pm
You can leave any social media site, any server, ever, at any time. You don't need to announce your departure. Just log out and "lose" the login.

You don't owe anyone an explanation for this.

If you think this guy will come after you, then talk to the authorities.
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Reply Fri 19 Feb, 2021 09:14 am
Do yourself a really big favor and learn to leave situations or separate from other people who make you feel uncomfortable or are dangerous to you. This is a skill that you must have. Otherwise you will marry an abusive person or be stuck in relationships that zap your energy and hurt your soul.

Feel free to just block anyone or you can sign off with a “ Hey ——-, I’m moving on to other venues for my future. Have a great life.” And then sign off.

So you must learn to do this or you are going to suffer your entire life being dragged down by other people because you don’t have The strength to save yourself.

Read up on co- dependency, too.
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