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Sat 28 Mar, 2020 12:43 pm
My boyfriend keeps on asking me to visit me. We live in different states in the Mid Atlantic region where there is somewhat prevalent virus. It's not that I don't want the company and I do care for him, but I don't want to have him here indefinitely (or at all) until things improve somewhat. I don't want to be exposed to something if not necessary and am working remotely as well. He's making me feel guilty for not inviting him down; calls several times a day and if I don't respond right away he gets hurt, etc. Even though I told him yesterday I wasn't certain about the weekend plans still I'm still getting over a cold, he tells me today he bought lots of food for us (he loaded up his car) and is ready to come down to see me. I feel bad but really? Isn't that a bit pushy. I know he's lonely and so am I, but don't we need to take extra precautions (he is close to 70 and I'm over 60). He says I'm fine and so is he and I need him to take care of me. Does he realize we can't sleep together, etc.?
Am I being unfair or insensitive or he is just being too pushy?
@cloudyjudment,
cloudyjudment wrote: he is just being too pushy?
I think the word you are looking for is stupid. Is he being stupid? yes. yes he is being stupid. everyone everywhere should be self-isolating right now. that means not spending time with people you were not living with prior to covid arriving.
if he decides to surprise you, don't let him in. keep door closed and send him home.
@ehBeth,
This sounds like another incarnation of that woman in her 60's that always has a bunch of uncertainty about whatever her older boyfriend wants or doesn't want to do.
Actually, this is an issue worthy of discussion. As families choose to combine and be considered as “ one unit” during this pandemic, there needs to be guidelines as to how this should be done.
BF’s life style needs to be considered. If he has self- sheltered himself for over 14 days and has kept his public contacts to a minimum, and he has no symptoms, the likelihood of him bringing the virus into her house would be low. Likewise for her. Still, some might insist on an additional quarantine in another part of the house for at least 10 days, to see if he exhibits symptoms.
The over- sixty crowd is especially vulnerable, but most severe virus cases have underlying conditions, namely diabetes, obesity, weakened lungs from years if smoking, heart issues, and other health factors. Most of my friends are healthy, even for being over 65, and we are hygienic and have stayed in.
I don't know of anyone with the virus.
Retirees (like myself) are extra pissed at how this virus is robbing us of valuable time. I miss my children, grandkids, friends, and BF, too.
So I’m for allowing 70 year old BF to long-term visiting, after taking in considerations about his health and outside contacts within the last 14 days.
( PS I don’t know if this is “our gal” who has chronic problems with men in her retirement years, but I will give the benefit of the doubt.)
@cloudyjudment,
No - he is being selfish - follow the guidelines and remain where you are. You are endangering each other and not to mention others....
I have a friend fighting cancer; another friend with two sons that have weaken immune systems; I have elderly family members; I have a brother who is a nurse.
Now multiply this by everyone else - these are the numbers you would be potentially harming by meeting up when it is unnecessary.
Let him know that.
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