Addressing emails, cards, notes, etc.

Sozobe


The Grump's rebuttal.

My gripe is not about the people are able to easily afford show-off pageantry. It is about the "common" people who cannot but try to imitate the elite. They make fools of themselves and misdirect their financial investment in life's important needs.

As for professional titles, I have many doctor friends (from a previous employment) who don't like to be introduced as "doctor." They prefer to be introduced as John or Mary Doe and let their personality and intellect stand on its own merits. I know this will irk you, but I lack impression by Phd "doctor" titles even though I know the work it takes to achieve it. It has always seemed a bit pretentious to me. I prefer that people be known by the first and last name, not their titles unless it is professionally relevant to the occasion. For example, Doctor and Mrs. John Doe seems silly to me. There is no relevance for use of the title. It's just putting on airs and makes it appear to be seeking respect.

BBB

One of the precepts that my mother drummed into my skull:

"Don't spend other people's time or other people's money.

I know a few academic doctors--both male and female--who glory in the title of "Doctor". Fine. If you consider "doctor" as a part of your name, I'll call you "Doctor". I reserve a right to have a private opinion on the matter as I do on many matters of etiquette-- but that is nobody else's business.

The putting on airs part is part of why it was fun for him. He'd never ask for it; he'd never use "Dr." to refer to himself. But to have it offered of her [my grandma's] own accord tickled him.

Grandmothers tend to think grandchildren are more important than Standard Usage.

Sozobe, I didn't mean to imply that EG is a Academic Flaunter. Obviously his grandmother makes her own rules.

Sozobe


Your mate obviously doesn't need the doctor title because both of your senses of humor make you both classy people in my opinion.

BBB

Aw, thanks BBB.

I totally agree that a certain kind of degree-flaunter is way annoying.

I think always Mr and Mrs X... because it's just standard English and you don't monkey with tradition!!

Generally speaking we sign things Dad, Mum, older sister, me... just because it's kinda the way things are done and it stops any arguments about who goes where...

But i'd always address things to the person i know best

Seems to me that the easiest way to address something is to put the primary (from a relationship to the sender standpoint) person's name first. Since the card is being sent by a friend of Linkat's (as opposed to her husband) then her name should come first.

As for signing, if the card is being signed as "X and Y" then whomever is actually doing the signing should put their name first.