Supermarket lobsters escape tank and terrorize shoppers

SUPERMARKET LOBSTERS ESCAPE TANK & TERRORIZE SHOPPERS

World Weekly News
By Nick Jeffreys

Lobsters terrorized shoppers in a Nebraska Food Rite supermarket after their tank shattered and they escaped.

Customers fled up and down the colorful labyrinth of food aisles, frantically dodging dozens of evil crustaceans that were aggressively brandishing their snapping claws.

"They were greenish blue devils, slimy and wet," says Reva Shubert, 33, who was in the produce department when the horror began. "Their little feet made eerie 'click-clack' sounds as they scuttled around finding victims."

The married mother of three says she quickly climbed into the tastefully arranged fruit dis- play and covered herself with cantaloupes.

"I hid myself well," says Shubert, "but I could see through a gap in the produce. I'll never forget the spraying blood and the screams of those poor people. I still have flashbacks and nightmares."

Shubert saw a man sprinting around the corner, his shopping cart on two wheels, one of the lobsters close on his heels.

"The lobster caught him by the ankle and slashed his legs until he let go of the cart and fell to his knees," says Shubert. "I didn't even know lobsters made noise, but it let out a high-pitched screech. It must have called to the others because seconds later, several of them were massing like mad flies on top of the man.

"They savaged him. I could see bits of flesh flying and a pool of blood spreading under him until he stopped struggling. When they ate their fill, they scattered to find others."

The same grisly scene was repeated all over the supermarket. The scurrying lobsters brought down six customers and an assistant manager before the police could shoot them all to shellfish hell.

"We got a strange call from someone yelling about a lobster attack," says Chief Benjamin Jones of the Treasure Town Police Department. "The woman said, 'I'm standing in the ice-cream case and I'm freezing to death. Hurry!'

"When we got inside it was a war zone. Bloody bodies of shoppers slumped all over the place. Overturned carts. The cash register girls were running in place on the black conveyor belts. Customers were hiding everywhere.

"The manager said the glass tank must have had a small crack and the pressure of the water made it explode, shooting lobsters all over the supermarket. They got the rubber bands off their claws so fast I think they already had it planned out. Who would have thought lobsters were so angry at us for boiling them alive and eating them? I used to enjoy a good surf and turf dinner. Not any more."