How do I be supportive on the anniversary?

Just give him a call on the phone. He'll take it from there.

And say what? He lives next door, I usually talk to him face to face. Would suggesting doing something together be disrespectful?

I always appreciated a call on that day, with the caller just saying they were thinking about how I was doing.

Give him a call. He will take it from there.

Maybe you could suggest lunch or something some day later in the conversation. See how he responds.

Thanks so much for your advice. I will consider doing that.

People are different. I'd sooner people left well alone, I didn't want to be constantly reminded of what had happened.

The kids and I remembered her on our own, in our own way.