Help with marriage!

No sir, I'm no troll. It's just been my experience when someone starts out with "you always" or "you never" there's a gray area where the truth is not acknowledged, leading to miscommunication.


No, but do you understand her point of view?


How do you know this is a lie? Did you call your sister to verify she doesn't want the two of you to fight? If you did, would your sister lie about that? Could this be an example of your wife's truthfulness that you choose to either ignore or not take seriously?


Whose idea was it to write down an apology? Is this a generally accepted way of receiving an apology? Are you building a file of misdeeds against her to "prove" your claims she lied?

Did you feel in the past, while you worked and she didn't, that it is her responsibility to keep the house clean and cook? And now, since you've broken up, she does NOT have that responsibility, even though you both still there together and she does not work and you do?

I think you've asked her to tell you she wants a divorce more times than you're willing to admit. So, how many times have you said, whether it's in the heat of anger or not, that YOU want a divorce?

I respect your patience Sunny.

This is a site dominated by Americans (and a few Western Europeans). We tend to not be very good at accepting or empathizing with cultural differences. Most of us have never experienced anything outside of Western pampered existence (Guided English speaking tours or Mexican all expense paid resorts don't count), and very few of us speak more than one language or have any respect for traditional cultures.

I think trying to do right by your spouse in a difficult situation is commendable. We are lucky in the US that divorces are fairly easy and don't come with a stigma... I wish you the best. I am not sure if cross-cultural empathy is possible here.

No, but do you understand her point of view?
Yes.

How do you know this is a lie? Did you call your sister to verify she doesn't want the two of you to fight? If you did, would your sister lie about that? Could this be an example of your wife's truthfulness that you choose to either ignore or not take seriously?

My sister and my wife were on conference to clarify differences.
My sister phone calls are recorded and she sent a copy of conversation to both of us to clarify the differences. That's why my wife apologised to me later.


Whose idea was it to write down an apology? Is this a generally accepted way of receiving an apology? Are you building a file of misdeeds against her to "prove" your claims she lied?

No its not a generally accepted way of an apology. I don't understand what is the big deal in a written apology as long as I did not force her to write it. I wish I had a file of misdeeds against her, I could simply walk to judge and would have gotten a divorce by now.

Did you feel in the past, while you worked and she didn't, that it is her responsibility to keep the house clean and cook? And now, since you've broken up, she does NOT have that responsibility, even though you both still there together and she does not work and you do?

I have clarified this earlier, Please read above.

I think you've asked her to tell you she wants a divorce more times than you're willing to admit. So, how many times have you said, whether it's in the heat of anger or not, that YOU want a divorce?

I have my share of problems, this is where you have problems! Please stop using you think and you can ask me directly.

We have discussed getting seperated multiple times when we could not agree on terms. I am not sure if this means divorce. The word divorce specifically has been used last time we argued

Thanx for the reply maxdancona.

Its better then other forums. Atleast people are real and they are willing to offer help and discuss, doesn't really matter if someone is a critic doesn't really mean he is a foe. Although its in human nature to be able to connect with people who can understand them, criticism can lead to self assesment. So I am thankful to everyone who has been sympethetic or being a critic.

Yes maybe we should not pre judge, have assumptions and have strong point of view's.

It's really cryptic on how you answer direct questions. It's as though you can out-think any one who questions you. However, point-by-point, you seem to slither by with cleverness and rhetoric designed to only show you're harmed in some way.

So, please explain how your sister knew how to record a specific conversation then have it typed out and sent to both of you to clarify differences.

You didn't answer whose idea was it to write an apology of wrongness. If it's not that big of a deal, then answer truthfully, whose idea was it to write an apology?

Again, simple and direct questions to you are met with resistance and rhetoric. It's as if you're covering up your misdeeds while inflating hers. In which case, that's not going to bode well for you. Truth is truth, no matter what side you're on.

On google play store you can download any app to record all the phone calls. Why would she type it, is this stone age? She forwarded the file from her phone to us by WhatsApp (A chat software).

I think I have replied all the questions properly above.

Covering Misdeeds, What misdeeds? We are living in a free world, you can choose to think whatever you feel like. Yes Truth cannot be modified as per your online expectations.