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Shygirly13
 
Reply Fri 6 Jul, 2018 10:06 am
Ok so first I am a 18 years old girl and still a virgin. I never had serious boyfriends before but once I met a boy. He is pretty cute and hot. First time I saw him I ended up on the couch with him and touching each other. I liked it but I didn't really orgasm, maybe because it was my first sexual experience with someone else and I'm really shy. But when we did it I did forget the pain I had because before his cat attacked me (it's a long story), so I think it's a good thing.

Anyway he mentions that he have feelings for me and that he wants to sleep with me. He says that I was really good when I touched him and he cum. That makes me happy and I'm attracted to him physically but I don't feel the butterflies yet…maybe because we barely know each other? I told myself maybe it will come after some time of knowing each other.

Also he looks really addicted to sex and I think it's normal cause well he's a boy. But I live with my parents and sometimes when he calls me up, he wants to talk about sex but I feel really shy and awkward talking about it. First I'm always afraid that someone heards me, but also I don't know I just don't feel comfortable talking about this…(he asked me if I had any fantasm and I said I didn't really think about it but once I had a sexual dream with *a male celebrity you don't need to know who* and we were in a private pool and it really felt good and one day I want to do this) I was even shy to do any sound or whatever when we touched even tho I still liked it (that ever made him wonder if I really enjoyed it) also I'm too shy to call him first because of it so he sometimes doubt of how I'm attracted to him.

I really want to experience making love with him, I want to know how it feels but at the same time I'm scared of everything new, and I'm shy and inexperienced (I'm also afraid that it might hurt or bleed cause his penis is kinda big for a virgin girl like me) Anyway while writing this I feel kinda excited but I don't know if I would know how to do it on the moment without being awkward.

Thank you in advance for the people who will reply (and please no mean comments or judging cause I'm really sensitive ty)
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Type: Question • Score: 0 • Views: 457 • Replies: 6

 
jespah
 
  3  
Reply Fri 6 Jul, 2018 10:30 am
@Shygirly13,
You sound like you don't like this guy much at all, at least not from what I'm seeing. Shyness is one thing, but it seems as if he's pressuring you. Also, are you underaged (under the age of 18 - 16 in some countries)? Because if you are then tell him to cut it out. Don't get into that kind of a situation if you care at all about what happens to him, because sex with underaged people can mean jail time in some places.

Don't do things you don't want to do. Don't have sex just because the other person is pushing you to do so.

And if you do have sex, with him or anyone else, get over your shyness enough to make sure you have birth control AND he uses a condom. Yes, EVERY SINGLE TIME.
najmelliw
 
  3  
Reply Fri 6 Jul, 2018 11:21 am
@Shygirly13,
Based on what you are saying here, I wouldn't advise you to go forward with sleeping with him soon because:
a) It sounds like you are attracted to him on a physical level, but not on an emotional one.
b) If you get the sense he is pressuring you, that's a red flag. Especially your first time should not happen because you are being pressured into it.

However, if you do want to proceed and get rid of the 'virgin card' (never liked that expression, really), my advice is: Let him woo you. Do the entire dating thing, getting to know him on another level than a purely physical one. That way, you can get a sense if you truly want to sleep with him, and also whether he is indeed pressuring you into this. Also, easing yourself into this more gradually might also help with your shyness.

Also, like Jespah said, use birth control and a condom. Don't budge on that either!
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Shygirly13
 
  1  
Reply Fri 6 Jul, 2018 09:51 pm
@jespah,
You’re right...I discovered that he’s not the one for me. And I said I’m 18 at the beginning of the post. But now I have another problem...he doesn’t understand that we’re probably not meant to be. Probably gonna ask about this...
jespah
 
  1  
Reply Sat 7 Jul, 2018 04:39 am
@Shygirly13,
Oh, sorry I missed that.

As for him not understanding - break up with him. I realize you are shy and you may be anxious, but you will not get want you want or need without becoming more assertive.
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maxdancona
 
  -1  
Reply Sat 7 Jul, 2018 06:42 am
@Shygirly13,
Quote:
I really want to experience making love with him, I want to know how it feels but at the same time I'm scared of everything new


I am going to say "go for it!". Why not? You are 18, this is a time where most people have already had sex. This is the time for you to experiment. Let's look at the reasons that you should have sex.

- Sex is enjoyable.
- This guy seems respectful of you. He told you he wants to sleep with you in a responsible way. It doesn't sound like he is pressuring you.
- You enjoy being with him.

The secret to a happy sex life is to first know what you want for yourself and to communicate this with your partner. There are very few people who spend their lives with their first sexual partner... hopefully he will be caring, sweet, understanding and respectful. Make sure he knows what you want and what you need.

If you want to have sex with him, and he is respectful and giving, I don't see any reason for you not to sleep with him. People do it all the time. Have fun! If you don't have sex with him, then you run the risk of having this exact same dilemma in two or five years. Life is for living.

I agree with the other posters about birth control and condoms.
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najmelliw
 
  2  
Reply Sat 7 Jul, 2018 01:09 pm
@Shygirly13,
Shygirly13 wrote:

You’re right...I discovered that he’s not the one for me. And I said I’m 18 at the beginning of the post. But now I have another problem...he doesn’t understand that we’re probably not meant to be. Probably gonna ask about this...


That shouldn't be a problem: just tell him that you don't want to sleep with him. If he keeps pressuring, just tell him you discussed it with people you trust/friends/family and came to the conclusion you shouldn't do it. Whom you discussed it with is none of his concern, really.
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