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Thu 21 Jun, 2018 04:33 pm
Hi,everyone, this is a desperate guy who ask for help to pick up a girlfriend. If anyone can give me some constructive suggestions, I will appreciate them very much.
I come from East Asia, I have a decent job and I am running an online business,even it is a small company but it is potential.In my spare time,I organize a voluntary organization to visit working –class kindergarden,in which the childrenˊs parents who work in sweatshops.Bring fun and happiness to these children is my purpose.
I hope I can bring some volunteers to visit the working-class kindergarden,where we can sing and dance,lead the children to play intellective games.
From the point of career,Iˊm not bad.But from the point of love,I totally lost.I havenˊt have a girlfriend yet. It is not my fault. I was raised in a family where there is no love exist.My parents divorced when I was a kid.My relatives were cold and selfish.There were not any female relatives care about me.
Iˊm not a boring guy,my appearance is not bad. I like Kungfu martialarts and Iˊm good at cooking. My hobby is comedy ,such as Molière and Mr bean.
I tried to find a girlfriend in my city, but I failed.The girls concern about height and wealth rather than my personality.Iˊ m not tall enough. We have very few social occasions to meet each other ,we have to contact each other on bbs forum of our city. Everyone have to post his/her profile data such as age\height\ wealth without a picture,if someone is not tall enough or not rich enough,he will be ignored as soon as possible.The game is so harsh.
I have to find another way.
There are some foreigner girls visit our country.I tried to say hello to them but I didnˊt have enough courage.I need a suitable occasion to meet a girl.
These days I came up with an idea,a plan which can kill two birds with one stone.Why donˊt I make the best of my voluntary organization? I can invite foreigner girls to join my group,we can play games with children,and I can choose one of them as my girlfriend.My project is kind of homestay for students who study abroad.I can afford their accommodation and meals. But the biggest problem is how can I avoid men or married women to join my group after I post my recruitment on public forum or social media like Facebook? Should I edit my recruitment and write down that the volunteers are only for female? Will I be accused as sex discrimination?Should I post the age range between 20-30years old? Will I be accused as age discrimination? How should I write properly? I have to aim more accurately.
Even I succeed in inviting some girls to my group, I still have some problems. If I ask her“Do you wanna be my girlfriend?” “Sorry, I have a boyfriend.” That means my previous efforts are wasted. Or maybe she replies “What are you talking about? Iˊm not interested in being your girlfriend.I came here just for the Children,not for you.”I donˊt want to be criticized that I have another intention.I understand the foreigner students come to my country just for learning and travel. “You are a good man ,but you ˊre not charming.”
So do you think my plan is weird,ridiculous ,unrealistic or unpractical?
The last opportunity is employ a female assistant for my small company. I can post a part-time job ad on lacal forum,and I will receive a lot of e-mails from girls.The problem is the girls are hunting for money,while I am looking for love, we are really apples and oranges. If I tell her that my money is tight, I canˊt pay your salary,could we bridge over the difficulties? ”No! I came here just for money. I must go now!”
Please help me!
@Jerry2200,
Advertise for anyone to help you. Male, female, old, young, married and not.
Anyone can know a single woman who might be interested in you, so don't just immediately dismiss the idea of older people or men joining to help with the children.
And if you see a woman you like, for God's sake don't immediately ask her, "Do you want to be my girlfriend?" Spend some time doing what you are actually supposed to be doing. Be the good guy who is there for the children. You will get to know this hypothetical woman better. Maybe you'll find you like her looks but she's a horrible person. Or you'll learn much more organically that she has a boyfriend -- or not.
No traps, no games, no nonsense.
And be there for the children and don't use them as just an excuse to try to pick up women. That is really, really not cool at all.
@jespah,
What jespah said is excellent advise.
It’s wrong to use your charitable organization to meet women. Don’t hire a woman for work when you are really interested in romance.
You must find an adult social venue to meet your needs.
Do you have a church/ religious affiliation? Any hobbies that can develop into meeting people? Did you let all your friends know you are interested in meeting a nice lady? Have you tried a dating service?
Don’t force this attempt to find a woman. If you relax and just enjoy life, people will be attracted to you.