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Am I overreacting and insecure or was he wrong?

 
 
Reply Sat 3 Feb, 2018 12:16 am
We recently went on vacation with some friends to celebrate my husbands birthday. One of his friends had asked me previously if it was ok with me to take him to a “show”. I looked at the reviews and didn’t have any problem with it. The show was very professional but did simulate lap dances and had some audience participation. I wasn’t concerned about my husband, we’ve been married a long time and I trust him. He’s also not the type to get on stage. After the show we met up with them and all laughed about the show but he seemed to be acting a bit different toward me. That night I found about a dozen pictures of the “show” and felt a few of them to be inappropriate, disrespectful, and embarrassing to me (one of him making a kissing gesture to a poster of a dancer, and another of a close up of a dancers crotch with VERY tight bottoms on which left nothing to the imagination). I told him how I felt and he said his friend had asked him to take the pictures because he didn’t have as good of a seat. He also explained that the close up must’ve happened by mistake when a dancer walked in front of his phone because he was never looking at anyone’s crotch. Then he explained that he was going to send them to his single friends because it was funny and he would have deleted them at “some point”. He says this is normal behavior but I felt it was inappropriate, disrespectful, and embarrassing especially with him sending the pics to his friends. Am I overreacting and insecure or was he wrong to do this?
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Type: Question • Score: 6 • Views: 236 • Replies: 16

 
roger
 
  3  
Reply Sat 3 Feb, 2018 02:01 am
@Nsecure1,
I do think this is an overreaction, but I am not you.
0 Replies
 
centrox
 
  0  
Reply Sat 3 Feb, 2018 04:34 am
Quote:
I felt it was inappropriate, disrespectful, and embarrassing, especially with him sending the pics to his friends.

Yes, it was all of those things

Quote:
Am I overreacting and insecure or was he wrong to do this?

You are not over reacting. You are married to a sleazebag. Unfortunately many men are like this.
0 Replies
 
ehBeth
 
  0  
Reply Sat 3 Feb, 2018 04:00 pm
@Nsecure1,
Nsecure1 wrote:
Am I overreacting


I'd say you're over-reacting but you need to sort this out for yourself.
0 Replies
 
ehBeth
 
  1  
Reply Sat 3 Feb, 2018 04:01 pm
@Nsecure1,
Nsecure1 wrote:
felt a few of them to be inappropriate, disrespectful, and embarrassing to me


you choose whether you feel embarrassed

I don't think (from your description) that they were inappropriate or disrespectful to you.
centrox
 
  1  
Reply Sat 3 Feb, 2018 04:11 pm
@ehBeth,
ehBeth wrote:
I don't think (from your description) that they were inappropriate or disrespectful to you.

Not pictures of "him making a kissing gesture to a poster of a dancer, and another of a close up of a dancers crotch with VERY tight bottoms on which left nothing to the imagination)"?
ehBeth
 
  1  
Reply Sat 3 Feb, 2018 04:28 pm
@centrox,
nope

I'd be fine with it - probably get a fierce case of the giggles - but it's a no harm no foul situation for me.
0 Replies
 
ehBeth
 
  1  
Reply Sat 3 Feb, 2018 04:29 pm
hmmm

interesting

apparently this viewpoint is fine for roger but not for me

gotta wonder about that
roger
 
  2  
Reply Sat 3 Feb, 2018 04:45 pm
@ehBeth,
How odd. For some reason, I thought we were in agreement.
ehBeth
 
  1  
Reply Sat 3 Feb, 2018 05:26 pm
@roger,
fascinating eh
roger
 
  2  
Reply Sat 3 Feb, 2018 05:49 pm
@ehBeth,
No! You're messing with my mind.
centrox
 
  0  
Reply Sat 3 Feb, 2018 06:14 pm
He behaved like a sexist, misogynist, objectifying pig. Have you read any newspapers over the last 6 months?
maxdancona
 
  1  
Reply Sat 3 Feb, 2018 07:49 pm
@centrox,
centrox wrote:

He behaved like a sexist, misogynist, objectifying pig. Have you read any newspapers over the last 6 months?



What's a newspaper?
0 Replies
 
maxdancona
 
  1  
Reply Sat 3 Feb, 2018 08:00 pm
@Nsecure1,
I think that you are overreacting. This is fairly normal behavior... heterosexual men like to see women in sexual situations. That is just a fact of the species.

What is acceptable in your marriage needs to be negotiated between you and your husband. Every couple is different. There are married couples who enjoy going to a strip club as a couple.
maxdancona
 
  1  
Reply Sat 3 Feb, 2018 08:01 pm
@maxdancona,
I would be better able to judge these shorts that "leave nothing to the imagination" if you would post the picture here Wink.
0 Replies
 
Glennn
 
  1  
Reply Sat 3 Feb, 2018 08:40 pm
@roger,
Quote:
No! You're messing with my mind.

No, not your mind, roger. She's messing with mine. Believe it or not, this isn't happening to you; it's happening to me. Don't know how, but she's somehow making me think that she's messing with your mind, but it's all in my mind. Sorry you got mixed up in this.
0 Replies
 
PUNKEY
 
  1  
Reply Sun 4 Feb, 2018 07:47 am
Well, you did give permission for him to go . ...

Laugh this off. Little boys must play?

What birthday was this? (The number)
0 Replies
 
 

 
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