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Punctuation suggestions?

 
 
Reply Sun 31 Dec, 2017 05:06 pm
Greetings, fellow wild 'n' wacky punctuation fans,

I'm writing a piece where the character is astounded by something another character has just said. I want to interrupt their reply with an ellipsis, then an attribution, to emphasize its amazed, stuttering quality. Here's the best way I've found:

"You've never...", I gasped, "been to Disneyland??"

Does that make sense to you? Or can you suggest a better way? Thanks!

P.S.: Only on rare occasions do I use double question marks or exclams, so you needn't warn me about that.
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Type: Discussion • Score: 2 • Views: 1,142 • Replies: 11
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jespah
 
  2  
Reply Sun 31 Dec, 2017 05:25 pm
@ander111,
Howdy and happy new year. I don't think you need the ellipsis at all.
centrox
 
  1  
Reply Sun 31 Dec, 2017 05:44 pm
@jespah,
jespah wrote:
I don't think you need the ellipsis at all.

Me likewise. Avoid typographical confetti (including more than one question mark!). Ellipses are much overused. Maybe you wish to show that the speaker was pausing for dramatic effect, or emphasis? Consider just using words to convey your meaning.


0 Replies
 
layman
 
  -2  
Reply Sun 31 Dec, 2017 06:58 pm
@ander111,
ander111 wrote:

P.S.: Only on rare occasions do I use double question marks or exclams, so you needn't warn me about that.


One of each is more better than doubling them, know what I'm sayin? For example: Can you BELIEVE that ****!?
0 Replies
 
ascribbler
 
  1  
Reply Sun 31 Dec, 2017 10:15 pm
@ander111,
"You've never", I gasped in absolute astonishment, "been to Disneyland?"

"No", she replied with droll hauteur, "I don't do queues."

I put down the holiday brochure and took her in my arms.
layman
 
  0  
Reply Mon 1 Jan, 2018 07:39 am
@ascribbler,
ascribbler wrote:

I put down the holiday brochure and took her in my arms.


Yeah, then what!?
centrox
 
  2  
Reply Mon 1 Jan, 2018 09:13 am
@layman,
layman wrote:

ascribbler wrote:

I put down the holiday brochure and took her in my arms.


Yeah, then what!?


, flung her on the bed, and then..... !!!!!


layman
 
  1  
Reply Mon 1 Jan, 2018 09:41 am
@centrox,
centrox wrote:

layman wrote:

ascribbler wrote:

I put down the holiday brochure and took her in my arms.


Yeah, then what!?


, flung her on the bed, and then..... !!!!!


Good to see you have some sense of humor, Cent. And you even threw in all the proper punctuation, eh?
centrox
 
  1  
Reply Mon 1 Jan, 2018 11:31 am
@layman,
layman wrote:
And you even threw in all the proper punctuation, eh?

Too many dots in the ellipsis.........
dalehileman
 
  0  
Reply Mon 1 Jan, 2018 12:08 pm
@centrox,
Quote:
Too many dots
Cen I have oft ast myself 'bout that !! also
....showing what a bright fella y'are
layman
 
  1  
Reply Mon 1 Jan, 2018 12:11 pm
@dalehileman,
The more dots, the more better the ellipsis, I always say.
dalehileman
 
  0  
Reply Mon 1 Jan, 2018 01:02 pm
@layman,
Quote:
The more dots,
Lay, 'in, ......couldn't 'gree more....
......./...Man.....,'tall !!
...
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