Have I completely messed up, how do I right this situation?

Reply Sat 28 Oct, 2017 03:15 pm
I started uni about 2 months ago and started seeing this boy in my flat and course. We were going so well, he seemed to really really care about me a lot would always say how much he likes me, introduce me to all his friends and parents, we'd be together all the time. Until one day about a month later he suddenly said we should just be friends and he never really liked me like that and all this sort of stuff like we were only friends with benefits (which is weird as we barely had sex, only about 3 times). I didn't believe what he said at all but just agreed to be just his mate and got on with it. He didn't speak to me then for a few days and kept messaging my friend in a really obvious attempt to get me jealous as I blew off the whole thing as if I don't care which I think annoyed him. However, we got close again just like before but without the intimacy and he stopped messaging her which proves it was to get me jealous. He would always speak to me and want to spend time with me and yesterday we were doing our biology assignment together and he was being really flirty with me, he kept stroking me face and lips and he got so close to my face several times I thought he was going to kiss me on several occasions. We were both going out that night and he kept saying hell see me at the club etc. When we got there it was fine, he got people to take photos of us together, but then I got really very drunk where I can't remember most of the night. He suddenly started being a prick to me and saying leave my mates alone but we were all in a big group and I'm friends with them to, and i dont see the issue if we're just friends, however he started acting like this after I kissed someone. I kissed 2 different guys and one of them wouldnt kiss me infront of him because he said his mates told him he would try to fight him if he saw him getting with me, which made me really angry and all I can remember is texting the boy i had a thing with a really angry message saying why won't this boy kiss me infront of you if we're mates and you don't care, and we went outside to talk and my friend with me told me we were getting really heated and he said to me we're just lab partners and i started shouting don't touch me then don;t touch my face and grabbed his face saying dont do this and he did it back to me and said it doesnt mean anything. He walked off and I texted him again really angrily saying leave me alone I want nothing to do with you we can be professional and thats it don;t message me and don't touch me. I also kissed anotheer boy however I can only remember him having blond hair and I don;t know how it happened, bu when i woke up the next day I had a boys number in my phone i didn't know so searched the name on instagram and the boy and all of his friends follow him, so I asked a mutual friend if he's in the group and she said yes. I messaged him this morning apologising loads saying I didn't mean what I said and I was just really drunk and flipped out for some reason I don't know why and he ignored for a while then said he doesn't know what to say. I kept saying I really am very sorry and he jst said it's fine, but it obviously isn't. He said just forget it but he won't speak to me and is obviously hurt. I don't know if he knows I kissed his friend but I only just found out now and I don;t know whether to say anything now or wait a bit or what. I really feel like I've messed up and we've both gone home for the week so won;t see each other but we need to finish our biology over the phone and then present it together when we get back. Please can I have some advice, he obviously really likes me and I don't know why he won;t admit it, I think he's not wanting a relatiobship but it doesnt have to go fast anyway. I really care about him even if it's just as a friend as we get on so well, please help!
Reply Sat 28 Oct, 2017 03:48 pm
Well, maybe at one time he DID like you more than just a friend, but no longer.

Why do you insist that he still likes you or even takes you serious?

Your antics show that 1) you may have a drinking problem where you don't know what you are doing when you drink and 2) kissing multiple boys in one night in front of each other is not the way to show any one if them that you are a serious person.

Hopefully you can complete the lab assignment. But really, anything after that, I would't count on.

Yes, you really did mess up.
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