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Wed 16 Aug, 2017 08:00 am
So I've been friends with this guy for over a year now. We met in a group setting and really hit it off as good friends who enjoy conversing about everything under the sun. We always found each other alone after the group splits and randomly decide to take long walks, whilst conversing. Although we weren't initially aware of the unique connection brewing, friends sort of figured it out and would occasionally mock me with it. The thing is, he isn't my usual type, given how i wasn't initially attracted to him in any way. But the way we bonded talking about things and always paying extra attention to each other was pretty revealing of what was happening. So fast forward, we recently were caught up in one of our walks and he confessed that he liked me a lot and surprisingly, it didn't take me a second to say that i liked him back too. From that point on, things really changed. Like we were kissing like lovers who missed each other for years and are happy to finally have each other. I felt the craving in every kiss. The thing is, we are both totally inexperienced in the physical intimacy department. I, for once, haven't gotten around being physical just yet. He too told me that he has had one or two encounters which didn't go all the way. So imagine my surprise to find out how every kiss and touch went deeper inside of me. We didn't sleep together just yet. But i'm already lost with all the kisses and touches we shared in this short period of time. Not even a month since we landed in this situation. I felt extremely open and freed. Like my mind, body, heart were all aligned in ways i never ever could imagine. We were passionately intense and aggressive but equally, tender and sweet all at the same time. I never thought i could feel this way and feel this calm about it. Even if it's an entirely new experience, it feels like i have been there before because of how familiar, home-like and what not it all feels. So coming back to my question, we are both based in different cities. Have different lives and priorities. Everything feels right. I don't feel unsettled. i am surprisingly calm about something this intense and this great. We have been so honest and vocal about how we feel about each other. I even wrote him a long essay-like message describing how our connection has gotten me feeling. I know he feels it too because he has told me so. I don't know how to proceed from this point on, given that there are conditions that aren't ideal which would eventually be issues. Like the distance between us. The fact that we are both very much used to being on our own and don't know how to take it to the next level. I, for once, feel like i can be in this as a relationship ( although i don't much care about the label) but i like him enough to invest in us. But how does one discuss those things at this early stage? How can one go on under such circumstances? I feel that the calm i feel right now is because i am not fully in, due to my very knowledge of the factors that will potentially affect the beautiful connection we share. So should i just let life go on its own accord? Like not have this conversation. Not dwell on the factors. Because what i am afraid of is the following. I am emotionally stable and calm at this point because i am still in my comfort zone and everything. But when the feelings get immensely intense and it's time to take it to the next level, what if those conditions that we put aside from discussing now affect us tremendously and then, we get hurt by the odds of it not working out. Purely out of external conditions. I just need to make some sense out of these train of thoughts i am currently entertaining from a safe place. It never hurts to be careful. I trust him fully because i know him as a good friend first. He is a good person who means well and has no hidden agenda. But how can one go on from this point on? I would appreciate your two cents on this. Thank you so much in advance.
You "go on" by just letting it develop. You need to spend actual face to face time together, since you really don't know each other well. So, dial back on the "everlasting love" you profess.
Don't overthink this. Just let it happen.
Have fun!!
@PUNKEY,
Thanks Punkey. The thing is, we do really know each other. I have known him for over a year. We've a solid knowledge of each other Except this time, we have yet to get to know each other as two people who like each other as more than friends, which is a completely different level of getting to know. So i will take your advice