i don't know if im really selfish or what to do with my life help!

help plsss

Your future does not necessarily have to be with either of them, you know.

So - you were in a long-distance relationship (they stink) and you were lonely and you hooked up with someone and then hooked up a few more times and the guy decided he loved you. He gave you an ultimatum and you chose the long distance boyfriend.

Did I get that right?

Don't worry about the decision, but consider why you cheated - and also why the relationship is long distance. Is your boyfriend in school? The army? Away for a job of some sort? Not old enough to move on his own? Will he move back (or to you in the first place)? When will that happen?

Because if the long distance is going to continue, then maybe rethink the whole thing. Not necessarily to go back to this other guy, but to reconsider the long distance bit. Four years is a long time to be in a relationship. I don't know how much of that time has been spent long distance, but if it has been more than a year, then you and he need to be figuring out how to end the long distance part of it.

Either someone moves, or school or the army end, or one of you quits your job. Or you get older if that's the thing holding you back from being together.

Long-term long-distance relationships, with no end date in sight for the separation, are just a cheating disaster waiting to happen.

it's been two years since we're in this long distance relationship, he works in another city and i study in an other so it's kinda difficult the only way is that i compelte my studies so we could live together again.
eanwhile i don't know why i keep thinking about the other guy i spent with him 4 months.. you know

yeah you got tht right i chose the long distant boyfriend instead of him

Isn't he a little young?

.... really?
4 year old relationship -_-

To an English speaker, a 4 year old boy or girlfriend is one who is aged 4 years.