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Losing virginity advice

 
 
Reply Tue 13 Jun, 2017 03:04 pm
Hello all, I m a 19 year old girl and I m a virgin. When I say virgin I mean I am a total 100% virgin. I ve never dated, kissed, hugged, or literally done anything with a guy (pathetic I know). I ve been talking to this guy who I have known for years and he recently expressed his love for me and I ve been talking to him for a while now. He wants me, like so bad. He knows I m a complete virgin, and loves everything about me. He wants to be my first

Ive been contemplating just having sex with him but the thing is that I am scared shitless. The way I look at losing my virginity is thsyb I don t really care about how/who I lose my virginity to I just want to get it over with. Also I'd like to put out there that believe me, I am READY for sex... like so ready. But I just get sooooo much anxiety over it. Like I don t know if I ll be doing it right, what if I m a bad kisser, what if I give a bad blow job? Are blowjobs normally something you do your first time? Help me I m clueless. or what if I smell or do something embarrassing? I ve never even KISSED a guy so the thought of actually having sex is terrifying. What I want to know is some advice.... what was your first time like? Was it bad/good? What can I expect? What was your first time like? . It just scares me and any help is appreciated thanks !!
 
jespah
 
  3  
Reply Tue 13 Jun, 2017 03:22 pm
@dropdead,
Whoa there, cowgirl.

Here's the deal. Spend some time together in a relationship or at least for some dating. Do the kissing and whatnot then. Don't do it all in one shot. Otherwise, you're setting yourself up for precisely this type of performance anxiety.

So - go out on a date. Or two. Take in dinner and a movie or play mini golf or whatever. Your first kiss should have some anticipation and mystique behind it - not an anxiety about whether you smell (you most likely do not).

Basically, don't have first kisses, BJs, sex, etc. as if someone was chasing you to just get it over with. Whether you wrap any of it up with emotion or not, you'll be a far happier person if you don't rush it like taking off a bandaid.
0 Replies
 
CalamityJane
 
  2  
Reply Tue 13 Jun, 2017 03:37 pm
@dropdead,
I agree with what jespah said, take your time and don't think that your first sexual experience is not important - it most certainly is! It will define your sexuality for many years to come so make sure it is with someone you love and treasure and will take the time to make your first experience a pleasurable one.

Trust me, you will remember your first kiss, your first sexual experience (doesn't necessarily have to be the same person) for the rest of you life - this is something you will never forget. Lovers come and go, but your first will remain in your heart and memory your entire life.

Make an effort to share this experience with someone you love and you think is worthwhile the memory you'll be sharing together.

Good luck and slow down!
0 Replies
 
ossobucotemp
 
  1  
Reply Tue 13 Jun, 2017 04:43 pm
Also, consider going to a gynecologist and getting on birth control. I've known friends who got a big surprise.
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McGentrix
 
  0  
Reply Tue 13 Jun, 2017 07:17 pm
You will remember it the rest of your life. Do you want a good memory or a regret?
Foofie
 
  1  
Reply Fri 16 Jun, 2017 01:26 pm
@McGentrix,
McGentrix wrote:

You will remember it the rest of your life. Do you want a good memory or a regret?


Did you say, "Don't be maudlin?" I remember the first squirrel I gave a peanut to in the park with my older sister accompanying me. It was wonderful. The squirrel raised his little front paws looking like he wanted to say, "A peanut for me?" I tend to think he remembered me as the adorable little child that cared enough for him to give him a peanut before the first snow arrived. Waxing nostalgic is vunderbar.
ossobucotemp
 
  1  
Reply Fri 16 Jun, 2017 01:38 pm
Sorry I didn't second Calamity Jane and McG on this matter. Very Happy
0 Replies
 
CalamityJane
 
  5  
Reply Fri 16 Jun, 2017 01:45 pm
@Foofie,
I knew it!! You never had sex, did you, Foofie!
daverod
 
  1  
Reply Sat 17 Jun, 2017 05:06 pm
@dropdead,
You don't have to have penetrative intercourse to get an STD. Herpes can be gotten through 'kissing' and other STD'S can be gotten by 'flesh to flesh' contact. Be careful...
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chirchri
 
  1  
Reply Mon 19 Jun, 2017 01:51 am
Bjs? Amazing to hear.
How did your date go?
Don't make things complicated ...
0 Replies
 
Foofie
 
  1  
Reply Mon 19 Jun, 2017 01:35 pm
@CalamityJane,
CalamityJane wrote:

I knew it!! You never had sex, did you, Foofie!


You mean the number after five?
CalamityJane
 
  2  
Reply Mon 19 Jun, 2017 10:20 pm
@Foofie,
Good answer!
0 Replies
 
 

 
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