My wife want to go visit a long time ago childhood friend that killed his wife in a prison in USA

Before I answered I had to read up about it a bit.
There are women who feel attracked to criminals, a bit dangerous criminals who have been steeling etc. Then there are women who write to murder,pedophiles and rapists. It is two different things.
When a woman writes to a murder or rapist it might be something like "take care of" save him and lead him on the "right way".
It is sometimes called the Florence Nightingale-syndrom. It is used
when someone against all odds wants to help and change a criminal.
More often it is used when a nurse falls in love with a patient or criminal.
I think she needs profesional help and if she does not want it, maybe you should talk with someone to support you with her ideas.
At the moment do not even start thinking about a second baby.

It really should be support you against her ideas.

Tell us about you and your wife's relationship. How long have you guys been together? Why don't you work? How long have you not worked? Fill in some details about the two of you.

Your wife is looking for an escape, possibly from everyday drudgery. I, too (hi tibbie), am curious about your home life as you are the primary caregiver for your son. There's nothing wrong with that, of course; it's more that a truly young child like that is often at least partly in the care of his mother.

My understanding is that Canada currently offers 18 months of maternity leave, so your wife is presumably home with you and the baby.

So, what does she do all day long, other than write to this guy?

I am curious - did you ask why she wants to visit him?

Is there some compelling reason? If she was very close to him say when she was young - does she feel that this person is like a family member? What sort of correspondence is she having with this person's mother? Is the mom asking her to visit? I am just trying to get in her head to understand why she wants to go visit him even if it was little expense on your side.

It does seem like a big expense to go visit someone you haven't seen in years unless she happens to have a family-like relationship with him (which I doubt if she hasn't seen/heard from him in so long--even without the murder charge).

I'd ask the questions just so you can understand her motivations. It might put you in a better spot too, to suggest that the expense is a burden on your family and her priorities should be towards her immediate family rather than some friend from years ago (much less a convicted murderer).

For you -- is it the money? Or is it that she is visiting this "friend" you find most offensive?

One other thought - if the mom is pushing your wife to help out -- and money is an issue - then your wife should see if the mom is willing to pay for her airfare ticket.

One other thing I was thinking as you have such a young baby -- has she been considered for postpartum depression? Maybe this is a symptom she may be? You might want to talk with her doctor or someone else that is experienced in this - maybe that is why she is acting this way?

Hello everyone, I am the wife and this is my side of the story. A little back story of this guy. I was 8yrs old when i met the guy in jail. almost every day i would be at his house for dinner. why you may wonder... ? Well beacuse i had a lot of family issues where i would get yelled at for no good reason. my parents would fight UFC style. (no joke) so guess where i would go for some peace and quiet?
my childhood friends house! there, his mom, sister and him would help me with my homework and give me advices. the day my mom split my head open with a broom, just because i was next door playing, guess who was there to help me out??? Yes him and his family!
for this reason i have every right to want to visit him and his family. Visits are superviced with lots of gards around. his mom will be with me and its only 2 days of visit.
I was invited to visit plenty of time this past year. but as u all know i just had a baby!!! this was good enough not to travel. I did tell him that one day i would visit when our son was old enough before he dies in jail.
Just the other day I asked my bf if it would be okay if i visited him before he died. I would like to see him again. yes he is a criminal who during a family argument lost his temper and the end result was her dying.
no one is perfect. This guy my friend is a good guy. but when pushing turns into shubbing all **** breaks loose.

he just had open heart surgery 4 months ago. so he is slowly recovering.
when i asked my boyfriend if he would be okay with it he said YES!!!
But now after saying yes he got cold feet. and now we are all here involved!!!

What i do all day is: I take care of our son as a mother should. I had a hard pregnancy. emergency C section. Long recovery where i coulnt stand for long of as little as sit on the toilet. just recently i was able to run. but to my bf this time is too long. he doesnt understand what it feels like!!! so this is why i have fallen behind on house duties. but time to time i do washing, and dishes.
Also i had pinched nerves on my wrists where is would be hard for me to pick up anything heavy, nor get up from our bed to litle alone pick up our son. I coulnt even hold a pen properly.

I am a personal trainer who loves to workout but after getting pregnant all this has changed. I am doing correspondence taking MATH. Upgrading my mark so i can become a LAB TECH. so i dont spend everyday writting letters. this year i found out his where about and it took me 1 yr to write him a letter. so far i have only sent 3 lettrs to him. So i dont have a syndrom not i want to run away from my family.

we all make mistakes and now my friend is paying for what he has done!

Then you can visit him next year.

In the meantime, go to your doctor for your symptoms and ask about post-partum issues.

OK I asked if your husband or is it boyfriend? He said you were his wife you say he is your bf. So that is confusing ....any way I asked your significant other if he asked why...so now it seems we know why.

He is the other question...do you have the money or will it put a strain on your family fibancually? This also seemed a concern of your significant other. Could ha mom help to pay? You have a child which should be your first priority, but if you are so close as you state I can understand wanting to visit.

Although I would have to say that stating everyone makes mistakes is a bit of a stretch comparing it to murder evendors if the killing was not premeditated and a result of happening while in the midst of a fight.

Yes everyone makes mistakes but killing someone else is not a mistake it is murder and yes no one is perfect but most imperfect people do not kill others. Sorry I don't think he is a good guy. Good guys do not lose their temper and kill their wives even if they are fighting.

I can understand if you had such a close relationship before like he is family to you wanting to see him, but I do think with all the strain medical and otherwise it would be in your personal best interest to see a doctor and check for post partum just I case.