Advice on overcoming strong feelings for one of my best friends.

Oh, this sucks. Truly, it does. Because if he is not interested in you romantically, then he is leading you on and may not even realize he is.

Does he know that you are gay? Let's start with that as a question. Because if he does, and he is doing this, then maybe he is interested but not sure of how to initiate things. If he doesn't know, then it's high time you told him.

I agree with Jespah here, very important question, is everybody in this story gay?

Jack
Is this the same dude you have posted about before?

Why do you remain so clueless?

The Truth is i dont even know if I'm gay, I've never experienced this before and never so much as kissed another guy. sometimes I get the feeling that he himself isnt so sure. I think that he suspects that i am gay as something has been said amongst friends before. This is the same person i am talking about, my mind is truly baffled and i dont k ow whether im coming or going.

Part of me just wants to cut off all ties and have nothing to do with him again just to save my own heart and mind. But even the thought of that is difficult and i honestly don't think i could keep it up. It has now got to the point where sometimes i wish i had never met him.

This has been bothering you since before Sept. 2016. With the same guy!

I would think you would be familiar enough with him to discuss intimate things - like that you are gay and wonder if he is too. (or bi)

How much time are you going to spend on this same issue? Your life is passing you by.

my problem is i have become too familiar with him to think about risking losing our friendship. I'm sure that even if the outcome isnt what i want he would be understanding but we wouldn't be as close as we are now i have mixed signals every week from him its alot more difficult than it sounds

"It's a lot more difficult than it sounds"

No friendship should be difficult. It's expected that we tolerate difficult co-workers and family members (to a degree), but friendships are in a different category. We get to choose our friends. Some friendships are a life long thing; other friendships may only last years or months.

You need to decide if the dynamic of this friendship adds to, or detracts from, your overall sense of happiness and well-being. You cannot assume that this friend (or any other unless they have shown otherwise) has your happiness and well-being in mind. Some "prey" on the weak and enjoy adding turmoil and conflict; it's a power play for them. Some feed off negativity. You've heard the saying, "Misery loves company."?

A true and good friend will always, ALWAYS have your best interests in mind in every action they take towards you. They will always seek ways to build you up, add to your happiness, and improve your life. If this is not the case then you cast them to the outer circle where you know that every interaction should be approached with the knowledge that they are in it for themselves, not you.

Thanks, the thing is hes a really good person, i guess this is just something ive got to live with, and hope my feelings die down eventually. or maybe try and take a step back. thanks all for your advice