0
   

My current situation

 
 
Reply Sat 1 Apr, 2017 04:43 pm
Hey everyone, this is me.
I am Louise, a questioning girl of nearly 16 years old.
I really started to question my sexuality when i first became very close to a girl called Emma. At first, i didn't know she was bi but i quickly understood as she told me that she slept with one of our schoolmates and flirting with some girls.

In my school, in the grade above me, there is a lesbian couple. I found one of them was incredibly pretty.
At the begging of the year, i remember that i would watch them when they would kiss outside my school.
It would fascinate me. I dunno why but it made me smile and i would always keep this picture of these two girls kissing in my mind.

I then met this girl called Bertille. We became good friends very quickly coz we had a lot in common. I had never had that kind of relationship with a girl before. We were very tactile: we would spoon, kiss in the neck, hold hands in the street, sleeping in a 1 person bed....
However, she was straight and dating my best friend.
At that time, i identified as straight and had NEVER questionned my sexuality.
So this got me thinking, "wait this is odd"

Later on, came the February holidays and Emma and I left for my grand-parent's house where we spent 1 week.
The 2nd night we were there, we had like 2/3 glasses of whisky each. We were with my cousin and we were pretty close all evening : we spooned in my bed, we would kiss in the neck/cheek...Next thing i know, we were having sex. So we weren't drunk but not 100% sober either. I remember turning the lights off with Emma in my bed and starting to kiss her back. I just felt normal and i was really into it. The sex was great btws.
.
The next morning and the rest of the week was a little awkward for the me. I had never really seriously thought about my sexuality. Everything happened so fast n so unexpectedly.
I was pretty confused and i hoped that she would come talk to me. But for her it was casual. It was double confusing for me coz i never had sex with someone and i had never kissed a girl before.
Later on we talked n she said that she was sorry that she didn't mean for it to happen. I was cool with it n so we decided to be friends.

A couple of weeks later, i met Zoe. She is gorgeous and she makes me laugh.
We spent the weekend together at this religious retreat. We ended up sneaking out of the building and getting drunk (vodka) with some other friends.
We kissed in a pretty horny way for like 20 min against a car with our friends filming us.

The next morning, we would hold hands in front of everyone (all very Catholic people) and whisper in each others​ ear.
I didn't quite know what it meant and i went home with a heart​ drawn on my cheek who said "Zoe+Louise".
I saw her again with the other folks we got drunk with. Around a week later, she posted on her Instagram profile a picture of two girls kissing.
So i just went for it and i learned that she has a boyfriend and that she is bi.

And this is my actual situation!
I feel very confused about sexuality:
- i never thought that i would be interested in girls
- i definitely enjoyed the lesbian sex
- i found Zoe and Emma hot
- i can't find someone who can help me and give me hints.

I hope that after this long story, you managed to get an idea of the situation and so give me help/advice!
Thks,
Louise

PS: I have told a few friends that i slept with Emma and kissed Zoe but hey immediately identified as lesbian bit i dunno if i am
 
dalehileman
 
  0  
Reply Sat 1 Apr, 2017 05:17 pm
@Louise 2001,
Quote:
i dunno if i am
Louise some go both ways and that's okay too

Thank you for the....

No, I'm 86, just kiddin'
0 Replies
 
jespah
 
  3  
Reply Sat 1 Apr, 2017 05:27 pm
@Louise 2001,
You're probably on a spectrum, because most people are. I suspect you lean more lesbian than bi, but that might have something to do with opportunity. If you don't spend enough time with boys and don't develop friendships which can lead to romances, then you wouldn't be kissing them, etc. This does not necessarily mean you would if the opportunity presented itself, but without it, you just plain can't.

You're young. Resist the temptation to put a label on yourself. Things may change. They might not. Don't set your life in cement just yet, okay? Whatever you end up being is what is right. Smile
dalehileman
 
  -3  
Reply Sat 1 Apr, 2017 06:25 pm
@jespah,
Jes I'm always impressed by your responses

Incidentally do you agree with Cen that to TD in NT is perfectly okay
0 Replies
 
Krumple
 
  1  
Reply Sat 1 Apr, 2017 08:53 pm
@Louise 2001,
Louise,

You mention nothing about romantic interaction with boys. Its possible that you seem drawn towards girls because they are available. Your guard is down around girls and there is no risk with sex with another girl. You are at ease with a girl.

So no boy history? Do you find any of them appealing?

There is nothing wrong or even to sort out. I'm asking to see if perhaps you are moving towards being gay because you haven't explored being straight.
Louise 2001
 
  1  
Reply Sun 2 Apr, 2017 12:18 am
@Krumple,
I have dated guys last year and the years before ( 5 or 6 in total i think).
However, i don't remember being attracted to them or any happy memories of when we were dating.
I am friends with a lot of guys and girls at school but i find girls prettier, like i think more "she's hot" rather than "he's hot".
For example, for valentine's day at my school, i got 5 roses from different guys but i didn't care about it.

I have explored being straight but i am quite sure i'm not, i don't know if I am bi or gay. I mean, i have dated guys in the past but now if feel like my mind only focuses on girls.



jespah
 
  4  
Reply Sun 2 Apr, 2017 09:28 am
@Louise 2001,
Then have fun in that direction. Be who you are, and that will be wonderful. Smile
0 Replies
 
 

 
  1. Forums
  2. » My current situation
Copyright © 2024 MadLab, LLC :: Terms of Service :: Privacy Policy :: Page generated in 0.03 seconds on 04/24/2024 at 02:02:40