Supporting chronically ill ex-girlfriend, straining friendship and finances

My one and only official ex-girlfriend (who having known each other as friends with possibilities until 6 years in when finally became physical) married a man who she was in a relationship with before and then following our official time together. She had spent many years on/off pushing to leave him but she was clearly torn between the two of us, which she didn't let on to the husband.
She's been chronically sick with heart, gynacological and kidney problems for many years. She had a tawdry pregnancy that was encouraged by doctors as it might have been her last year of fertility two years ago which nearly killed her. When her husband had to leave his job to look after her and the baby full time and i had to pay for rent and supplies for nearly a year (which meant taking up an extra part time job during nights and sundays on top of my salaried day job and my skills related job at the weekend. When she got super close to leaving him end of last year, my father who objected to me helping her financially as i was not officially in a relationship with her made threats against the father of the husband to make the husband make me stop supporting her. This was enough to rattle her to the point where she just came out with the decision that we could never work together as long as my family and friends hated her for what they perceive she's done to me. We both said this was a horrible but necessary decision to come to but we also know in no way could they survive without my help until any assistance is found.
I am still supporting her for supplies, medication (UK so is cheap but there is a lot of it to buy), food, bills and travel money to the hospital and therapy, which probably accounts for 75-80% of my earnings each month. I have to pretend to my friends and family i'm not doing this as they despise her (not for who she is but for how much pressure it's putting on me) but still have to make excuses as to why i can't come out to things or do anything social anymore. I can't move on because i can't even spare an evening to start trying to be social or even be in a place where i might meet someone (and if i did it would be pointless as i wouldn't be able to afford anything for them), i cannot go anywhere or do anything now unless i'm guaranteed it will be to earn money. i'm averaging a 90-110 hour work week. Because of this i am permanently stressed and she notices this when i pop over to hers to drop off money or supplies or whatever she needs, i have the tendency to snap and get short tempered if she asks for more stuff. I don't blame her for any of this, she didn't ask to be sick and unable to support herself. None of my friends or family will hear anything about her now so cannot ask anyone for advice anymore. I do not know who to turn to as she thinks i don't care for her or even love her anymore. and to be honest i don't hate her and i feel sorry for her but it's hard to be 'a friend' when you basically can only talk in depth over text and you cannot be given any privacy or time to talk in person. No matter what i tell her she's upset as she thinks i blame her for my current depression and levels of high stress. And the problem is...i don't blame her....but i feel it's because of what i ahve to do for her that i can't be happy anymore.


What can i do?



(bear in mind i cannot take holiday or time off as i can't afford it & i cannot afford or have time for counselling)



thank you for reading.