Between a rock and a hard place

Reply Sun 27 Nov, 2016 06:29 pm
So.... I'm 24 n married for 4.5 years. I have two kids, 6&2. Lately I had enough how I was being treated by my husband ( nothing bad, just attitude, cleanliness, laziness etc) and I blew up! I threw a plate at him! Scared myself by my actions as have never ever lashed out before.

I decided to join an onlins dating site to have a look around. I ended up chatting with an old school friend who I use to hang with, (must add, I never posted a picture of myself and change a few details like hair colour etc!)

We got chatting online, what was going wrong in my marriage etc, he really listened to me. I purely went on the site to make me feel wanted as me n not a mum or cook, cleaner etc.

I gave him my number n started to text each other till early hours of the morning. Spoke about things very few people know about both of us etc. He is amazing at boosting my confidence in myself. Yesterday was his birthday, I decided to tease him a little n we ended up sexting, which is u like me, today he's been very reserved n we've hardly spoken. I don't know if I'm just being paranoid,math at he's actually just getting over his hangover or if he's got what he wants n is no longer interested. I know I shouldn't be worrying about it seeing as I have a husband at home but this guy really gets me n makes me smile.... What do I do? I feel like my cyber life could boost the relationship with my real life!? Happy wife happy home?
Reply Sun 27 Nov, 2016 07:42 pm
I wish there were easy answers for this stuff. Have you considered couples counselling?
Reply Sun 27 Nov, 2016 07:50 pm
Msconfussed wrote:
What do I do?

Have you decided what you are going to do about your marriage?

You can't really continue in a relationship where you're blowing up and throwing plates. That's not a good situation for the children to be in.

Do both you and your husband work? what do you do as a couple - date nights etc?
Reply Mon 28 Nov, 2016 02:53 am
It was the first time I had blown like that. I was angry at myself for doing it. Yes we both work, he works 8-5, sometimes 7 or later and I work 10pm-7.
He's more interested in play virtual games on his pc then spending time with me so I end up watching tv or going for a bath. We only tend to go out on special occasions as spare money seems to be disappearing lately
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Reply Mon 28 Nov, 2016 02:54 am
No I haven't, I just feel numb emotion at the Moment toward the situation.
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Reply Wed 30 Nov, 2016 12:03 pm
As ehBeth suggested, first decide what you want to do about the marriage. If you want to keep the marriage, then stop the flirting and work on the marriage. Suggest to him a weekly date night. It doesn't have to cost a lot of money, it just needs to get the two of you out of the house and him away from the pc. Talk to him about how you feel neglected when you are both home and he spends all his time on the computer. If necessary, and you really want to make things work, suggest seeing a counselor.

But no, looking outside the marriage to make yourself feel better about yourself is not going to help your marriage.
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