what can I do to save my life??

Hi my name is Scotty
I've never posted on something like this before but I am at a loss
4 years ago I married my husband Jay in 2012
It has been a disaster.
Before Jay I was a typical gay teen, went out had fun and friends. Then I met Mark. He is and I still believe he is the love of my life. Things didn't work out. When I met Mark he was 19 I was 20 *this is 2007 and after I return from a study abroad we dated long term
I have never been more sexualy or emotionally attracted to anyone more than Mark.
After our breakup I went into a deep depression. I moved away to get away from him and after months of not speaking he called me the night I moved to another city. I didn't come home.
Years later I met and married jay. What's worse is I proposed to Jay minutes after seeing mark at a music festival, the first run in we had in years
I felt I needed to move on and that Jay loved me.
I had only known him 3 months. We eloped and we're married 4 day later.
I saw his true self the day after we got home from eloping. His temper, a valcano, made its first apperance. The first time he threw glass at me a month later, slicing open my leg, I called my parents. We all met for dinner.
It did not go well.
I knew then, four years ago, I did NOT want to be with jay. My *Catholic parents, after me crying my eyes out and then excusing myself to the bathroom told Jay I was now his problem and they were done with me.
Since then I've spiraled into a four year long depression. I thought a dog would help and I got a good one
Jay proceeded to bring home 2 more without my consent but demanding of constant care he doesn't help at all with them and it's become a burden
Worse, the abuse has amped up over time. He's driven all my friends away, blocks numbers on my phone controls and takes the money I earn and the physical and mental abuse has amplified significantly
I have no where to go... and worse Mark called my last week and tried to reconnct. Jay found out and destroyed it. I'm two thought away from checking out but I know I'm still young beautiful and so capable of... something. I just have no idea how to get out of this toxic marraige. His threats of violence and acts of violence I can not understate. What do I do?????