Help me understand if I overreacted or is boyfriend playing the victim as usual

My boyfriend steady plays the victim in every argument! We met up after not seeing each other in 5 days & we BOTH never initiated a hug or kiss, he was just into his phone & his body posture just sucked & he just looked mad after not seeing me for those 5 days. During those 5 days he was in Illinois & wasnt texting me/ignoring calls or wasn't letting me know what he was doing and left me hanging on a limb ...which eventually made me worry while he was out of the state. So when we finally saw each other I snapped bc of his shady behavior due to him doing the same thing like he did to me when he was in Illinois, just leaving me out to dry & not communicating. Now he was just into his phone and doing the same things he did to me in person as he did in Illinois & was telling me to just leave & basically wanting me to kiss his ass bc he said "he owns me & I m suppose to initiate things & cause things will go his way not mine". So I snapped & I apologized the next day but he also said hurtful things, I saw hurtful msgs/things in this phone that shouldn't of been there & he said disrespectful things to break me down. Now after all this happen he tried to manipulate everything & blame everything on me & saying enough is enough & how I will pay for "snapping" & deserve a punishment. I m tired of arguing and trying to fix the situation while he is steady playing the victim which he always do in every situation even when he starts them & contribute to our circumstances. What s crazy he never mentioned anything he did or even the msgs that was in his phone..he talk like I m the only one that did anything & all I did was snap. He had msgs that showed his unfaithfulness. What do I do? Should I not contact him till he s ready to be mature & take some responsibility? Help