oh man, we're going to a furry convention full of weird sexual deviants?
I'm going to have to drink myself brave.
Hey, why don't we drink with the furries.
furry beer does not taste all that great. It is warm, and it has hairs on it.
Why the hell did we come here?
Oh yeah, they jacked up movie prices and we needed something to do.
Tee hee. We've been spotted without tails - run for it!!!
(I turned mine into a recap of an adventure)
Hey, I have an idea! Why don't we have a masquerade party? Of course everyone can come. Except Slappy!
Uh oh, I'm almost out of money. Hmm, how can I get some cash quick? I know! I'll roll a drunk! Damn, he almost threw up on me. But I got outta there just in time, and look! I got $20!!
Chillin' out max and relaxing all cool, I stepped in somebody's disgusting drool. I was shocked and embarrased, and sad cuz I care, but the first drunk I stepped on just didn't wanna share. The second drunk I found sleeping on my lawn, I said "share some whiskey, or else begone!" He shared a drop which was really quite nice. The third drunk that shared had sake, made from rice!
cavfancier wrote:
Chillin' out max and relaxing all cool, I stepped in somebody's disgusting drool. I was shocked and embarrased, and sad cuz I care, but the first drunk I stepped on just didn't wanna share. The second drunk I found sleeping on my lawn, I said "share some whiskey, or else begone!" He shared a drop which was really quite nice. The third drunk that shared had sake, made from rice!
Very well done! You've rasied the bar to a whole different level! Just had to give you my
samantha&angie wrote:cavfancier wrote:
Chillin' out max and relaxing all cool, I stepped in somebody's disgusting drool. I was shocked and embarrased, and sad cuz I care, but the first drunk I stepped on just didn't wanna share. The second drunk I found sleeping on my lawn, I said "share some whiskey, or else begone!" He shared a drop which was really quite nice. The third drunk that shared had sake, made from rice!
Very well done! You've rasied the bar to a whole different level! Just had to give you my
Why thank you! Somebody still needs to fill in the one I posted.
Wow, Cav! S&A is right; it's daunting to follow that rap.. was it meant to remind one of The Fresh Prince of Belair?
PIES AND PENITANCE
1.
It was the evening of the 'No Slappies' club. Eva had brought together like minded peropple, who were disturbed by Slappy's recent adaption of Rapper's slang. Gautam had baked a lovely pie for them all, which they would eat after they had considered emergency measures to stop more people from singing 'Still D.R.E' in the style of the guy who sung Camp Granada.
2.
There was a bang. But it was not from the subversive Slappy c ult, but rather from Eva, who had ascended the platform and was banging her shoe to get attention. 'We must destroy him.' 'But How?' asked Bear.
3.
Plump Buck Mulligan who we threw in Hier for no reason whatsoever, opened his eyes and said 'Go this way.'
Oh, damn! I must go, but will do the rest when I get back!
It's a good start there drom, and yes, it was a Fresh Prince reference. My brother lives in Philly and knows the whole theme song.
This is something different from what I had intended, which I've completely forgotten.
4.
'O Slappy,' Eva said, and for no real
Explanation, they talked in morbid verse;
And Slappy, bored with life's dull drain did curse
All those who lacked his neverending zeal.
'Here, here' she began, 'at least you have me
To bear with your foul moods. Now, eat this up.
I have put inside your own Barbie cup
A slice of blueberry pie, for you, free.'
5.
Written by TS Eliot, beyond the grave
Because he could not stop--
Because he could not stop from-
Because he could not stop from eating
Because he could not
Because he could not stop from examin-
Ing
The perfect piecrusts and the luscious fill-
Ing
Because he could not stop from thank-
Ing
His guest, he fell to the floor.
6.
Prologue
My muse; he sits in silence like the night
Uncovered by the vales of distant dreams--
But through his reverie, he knows he might
See all his plans unbuckling at the seams.
Chapter One of Part 6
Occom Bill. Light of my life, fire of my loins. My sin, my soul. Oc-com-Bill: the tip of the tongue taking a trip of three steps down the palate to tap, at three on the teeth. Oc. Om. Bill.
He was Oc, just Oc, sat there in his slacks in the morning, the morning when the news arrived. Looking unusually cool and fashion-conscious with his combination of dungarees and 'bling-bling' jewellery, Occom was sat there in his shades, drawing another picture for KC, when-- all of a sudden-- the phone rang.
The Part formerly known as Part 7-- now known as Vrotrootabischinak, or 'Chitty Chitty is such an awful name for a car.'
'Slappy's unconscious?' squealed Occom. 'And you've found three copies of "Get fit with Sonny and Cher" on his body? My God!' And he started to laugh to cover for the fact that he wanted to get over there to get a copy for himself; because, as our Hero reasoned, who wouldn't want a free Cher fitness video?
8.
Mr. Doo Hoo
'This was Mr. Doo Hoo's Room. He stayed
The whole time he was with the Bodies, till
They moved him.' Eva's eyes looked dense, afraid
Someone would find her, shop her to The Bill
After she killed with gateau. Then, a hand
Reached out and grabbed her ankles like a hook.
When her new lodgers were elsewhere, she fanned
Herself, and broke Hoo's finger with a book
She found behind the door; made in Thailand.
The lodgers came in, said they'd take it, so
She acted as if she needed to go
For something that a while back she had planned...
'Before I go,' she added, 'I must tell
You that some people--' then she rolled her eyes--
'Have been making their own proposterous lies
About how this place is haunted by Hell
And all its fury.' They all laughed aloud
Not noticing the hand twitching below,
And something else twitching like a small toe--
Oh hell forget it, let's all get pizza and forget about what happens.
Resolution:
9.
It is a truth universally acknowledged, that we have come throught this tale, with all the expectancy of San Marino and with all the virility of Finland.-- We have experienced all the beauty of a shopping mall in Nebraska and the innovativeness of a person who thinks that they've invented something new if they change a few letters in its name around. (As in Veletision.)
So, you might say, Slappy is dead, and Occom stole his Cher tape. Not so. Slappy lay down there, ready to die, and Occom looked pleased, until Slappy started singing a most beautiful, if feeble swan-song:
'Do you believe in life after love?
I can feel something insiiide me say
I really don't think you're strong enough,
Now.'
Occom's heart filled immediately with pity, not at his state, but pity that a Cher fan should ever sing that song. He was taken for unlawful surgery and survived it all.
Back in their majestic house, Slappy had an idea. All like minded people would win the Anti-Slappists over through the gifts of love and song. Soon, they would no longer have to fear for their lives due to knowing all the words to the Shoop Shoop song, Slappy promised.
KC looked at them glaringly, and then left. 'I can't LIVE with people who disagree that Gloria Estefan is better than Cher.' He banged the door in a very dramatic fashioun, then realized that he had caught his coat in the door; then tried, failing, to try not to diminish the drama of the first bang. Their friendship was over, but Occom and Mr. Doo Hoo lived on.
10.
Eva was waking up to a bright new morning. There was only one thing wrong with it; outside her house, Occom, Slappy, McGentrix, and some random people who were there to make it look good, started singing the words to 'I got you babe,' taking turns with each line.
It was a motive that failed to win Eva's heart. Nevertheless, on top of the situation as always, she realized that there was a better way of dealing with them than all-out warfare. 'Care to come in for gateaux?'
'What the hell are you doing?' asked Edgar, who just appeared at the end of it all in a Cameo role that won 4 Oscars, The Pulitzer prize for Cooking, and The Soy Milk Federation's Personality of the Year award. 'Oh,' said Eva, 'there's a reason behind everything.'
Walking back from the kitchen into the hall where Edgar observed things, she shouted back: 'if the police call--- it's a Cult meeting.' And they all lived happily henceforth.
Wow drom....I'm actually not quite sure how this relates to my emoticon post, but it's a fine piece of writing.
Now it's your turn to put up another emoticon collection.
