Chemistry

Because Jesus says "No."

I said nothing of the kind.

But my uncle Dimitri willed that elements should have different properties. And silver is just not an active metal. Good news if you're saving for Armageddon. Oh, right. They will throw their silver on the streets.

Whatever

I never knew you were Mexican.

Dmitri?!
As in Dmitri Ivanovich Mendeleev?
I spelled it wrong, last. Sorry.

But he's dead, so he doesn't know.

Jesus. Mexican.

Aww. Heck!