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Thu 21 Nov, 2013 04:16 pm
am i being unreasonable: i have been very fortunate to meet affectionate, interesting, successful men online. i develop good communication with them and get asked out immediately to dinner and there ensues attraction, a second date, and on. i do like to kiss, hold hands and embrace while dating but i will not have sex for the whim of it while getting to know the compatibility behind the attraction. attraction vs. compatible relationship are two different things, right?
these men who do not have a good relationship history, they never married or single for over 10 ten tears after marriage. they meet me and either offer to only date me suggest the girlfriend word too. but, they also want the instant reward to have sex, within a week or two, just a few dates. i will not do it, decline authentically and softly, not rude or rejecting. but, they withdraw, turn silent, and retreat from the new relationship and my decline for immediate sex. am i being unreasonable, ruining budding relationships with men most women wish they could have?
help me with this one, please.
@gg whue,
Hi, You're doing the right thing, you just haven't met the right guy yet, they're being immature by not understanding your point of view. Some men see sex and affection as the same thing. When you meet the right guy they will understand your views and take the slow path to real compatibility.