Reply Thu 26 Sep, 2013 06:05 am
This thread is a game where the posters compose a terrible question a typical HR rep would ask his interviewee.

I'll be the first to ask a question. In it, I'll have a noun that begins with the letter A. The next person if he or she wants can answer it in his post and then he or she will write another goofy question while using a noun that begins with the letter B. And so forth.

QUESTION 1:
With a pumpkin spiced Yankee candle and a bent spoon, how would you defend your family against a pack of rabid giant anteaters?


If you need some real world terrible interview questions to inspire your own then read this:
19 Impossibly Tricky Interview Questions
http://www.buzzfeed.com/tabathaleggett/impossibly-tricky-interview-questions
 
jespah
 
  3  
Reply Thu 26 Sep, 2013 07:00 am
@tsarstepan,
Answer 1: Launch the lit candle at the anteaters, using the spoon. The anteaters, mesmerized as we all are this time of year by all things pumpkin, begin to eat the wax, thereby turning into zombie candles. Then sell the zombie candles on eBay.

Question 2: Decide on the direction of our business equipped only with a sentient Border Collie and a Ouija board.
tsarstepan
 
  1  
Reply Thu 26 Sep, 2013 08:01 am
@jespah,
I'd slap a company logo on the Ouija board and then I'd strap the board onto the collie's back. In a guerrilla marketing campaign, I'd have her go around Times Square having the tourists play with the Ouija board and thusly increasing our brand image.

Question 3.: If you were a chicken then what kind of chicken dish would you like to be cooked up and served as?
jespah
 
  3  
Reply Thu 26 Sep, 2013 02:30 pm
@tsarstepan,
tsarstepan wrote:
....

Question 3.: If you were a chicken then what kind of chicken dish would you like to be cooked up and served as?


Parmesan. 'Cause everybody loves cheese.

Except for vegans and the lactose intolerant. And that's a reasonable ratio of love: hate.

Question 4: If diamonds are a girl's best friend, craft a company ad campaign for girls with friends with benefits.
boomerang
 
  1  
Reply Thu 26 Sep, 2013 07:07 pm
@jespah,
Emeralds: for when you just want to f--- her.

Someone is threatening to pull your feminist card. What did you do?
chai2
 
  2  
Reply Thu 26 Sep, 2013 07:21 pm
@boomerang,
boomerang wrote:

Emeralds: for when you just want to f--- her.

Someone is threatening to pull your feminist card. What did you do?


Bitch slap the stupid c*nt and tell her to go knit you a sweater.

Gregory House invites you to join his diagnostic team, with the stipulation that you must get Dr Chase to confess to the murder of the African dictator....how do you accomplish this?
jespah
 
  2  
Reply Fri 27 Sep, 2013 05:50 am
@chai2,
Grab a candlestick and the dudes from Ghost Hunters and whap the ghost of Idi Amin with said candlestick. Chase is bound to confess once the sight of the beaten yet spectral Ugandan becomes clearer.

Harmony's great when you can sing. Sell me karaoke for people who can't sing.
DrewDad
 
  1  
Reply Fri 27 Sep, 2013 06:58 am
@jespah,
jespah wrote:
Harmony's great when you can sing. Sell me karaoke for people who can't sing.

Trick question. Karaoke is already for people who can't sing. What you want to do is sell ear plugs that autotune.

I am awesome. My awesomeness is obvious because I am interviewing you, and you are not interviewing me. Please expound on how awesome I am, by praising the company I work for.
tsarstepan
 
  1  
Reply Fri 27 Sep, 2013 10:49 am
@DrewDad,
I heard that since you won all gold medals at the first annual Awesomeness Olympics this year that you will be the first person entered into in the Awesomeness Hall of Fame. That they will shut down all further entries into that august Hall of Fame indefinitely as there is no one more awesome then you who can even come a distant second to your awesomeness.

How would you secretly get everyone in the office to get drunk on J├Ągermeister without them knowing they were drinking alcohol in order to get the usually conservative office staff more creatively empowered?

tsarstepan
 
  1  
Reply Wed 13 Apr, 2016 11:13 am
@tsarstepan,
Hide the Jagermeister in the office coffee. People can be so desperate for their morning fix of caffeine, they won't care that the coffee tastes like crappy cough syrup.

You're working for the Trump campaign. How would you PR spin, the latest Klu Klux Klan Grandwizard endorsement for the candidate whom you work for.
jespah
 
  2  
Reply Wed 13 Apr, 2016 01:18 pm
@tsarstepan,
The Klu Klux Klan has endorsed my client because of the whiteness of his sheets.

Trump. A candidate laundrymen everywhere can believe in!
0 Replies
 
tsarstepan
 
  1  
Reply Wed 17 Oct, 2018 08:11 am
Giving this one a push. Answer this question anyway you feel fit though you will need to include the M [Men at Work] in the equation. Then follow up with a question with a noun/term beginning with an N. And so forth....
How many Men at Work coverbands do you think can stand on the head of a needle?
0 Replies
 
edgarblythe
 
  1  
Reply Wed 17 Oct, 2018 08:26 am
What I know about Men at Work would fit on the head of a needle. Would indeed fit the head of an atom, like a little cap.

Have you any objection to getting neutered accidentally, should the equipment malfunction? What about overtime?
0 Replies
 
 

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