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Intense breakdown on Large life decisions

 
 
ossobuco
 
  1  
Reply Sun 26 Feb, 2012 08:01 pm
@vikorr,
Ok, you used two breaths.
I'm not perfect here, having just lambasted a poster or two myself over superficial matters, but your attempt to ground a twenty one year old sounded assumptive and insulting. Still does.
bye for now.
vikorr
 
  1  
Reply Sun 26 Feb, 2012 08:13 pm
@ossobuco,
Quote:
your attempt to ground a twenty one year old sounded assumptive and insulting. Still does.


You are welcome to your perspective, but before you hound people for what you perceive to be assumptive & insulting, please make sure what you are reading & interpreting isn't just a result of your own prejudices/paradigms, rather than what is being said...

...you started with a wrong poor assumption about what I was saying. Trying to explain the meaning to you only brought on more just plain wrong assumptions.

You see an insult where frankly, none was implied - that is a reflection of your way of thinking, not mine. As I said - we all have our own journeys to make - our own strengths and weaknesses, our own learning methods.
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ModernVisage
 
  1  
Reply Sun 4 Mar, 2012 11:35 pm
I must apologize for how vague my request was and thank you all for your comments.

We are nitpicking my words on a grand scale when they were only a whimsical expression of my yearning for a mentor. My passions hold a grip on my daily focus despite my ADHD tenancies; though it is a manageable deficit it complicates consistent work on some, less interesting, activities much like the mandatory stop signs along an urban road. This also helps me generate bursts of will.

The list was intended to example my interests and hobbies. Simplified, in this form there was no implied lack or excess of time spent in any one of them but they are cumulative activities and I will not allow them to consume ever drop of energy in me. Wanderlust is louder than those passions; so unless I inherit a palpable sum of money these need stoking. Note: my motivation is dwindling only because my lack of freedom.

I will be living with my parents for a few months longer until I can get on my feet. How do stars and masters find the time in normality to deviate. A freedom to spirit myself away is a good way to get lost or find rumors but doesn't help pay rent.
There are times spent as a homeless man. I was a wanderer but decided to never take that step onto a train and become a hobo. I'm glad for that because there are a number of other countries which would be better to do so in.

Lets not get lost in my mind. (I usually write with a pen and letting my mind flow with my fingers is new)

Since I am new to this site I'm not sure how to quote and use other fancy features so I must go by memory before you lose your eyes on this gluey substance of light.

Mentioning a need for grounding would be good for me. I am level headed and
can relate to many people but I act as an ubermensch, or a psychopath as some civilized people have told me. There is a rope for me to slide down to reality when I wish but I enjoy jaunts on the lobes of my brain as much as on the road. Culture is a dynamic vat for us to donate to.

I understand that a meditative walk's pace is part of developing skill and especially in cultivating money from that skill. These facts do not bother me. I can drill or micromanage myself when need (or rely on the butting head of the internet).

If I want to become a writer I know I'll need to study and I have read a few books on the subject. I see possibilities all around me since I have diversified myself very frequently and sometimes get lost in what we understand to be reality. This also happens very frequently during my brisk bike rides at night while I respect the stars while I can still see them in LA.
If you know the carl jung personality test I have always been an ENTP.

My resolution is to do It all but one of my huge questions is about the split thats in my life. Which is

Air Force (engineer or EMT)
Because I want to know how to repair my machines (the same reason I learned a bit about electronics)
I do not want to wait until after my degree to become a pilot but It is something I've always wanted to do. Take people places, think while the auto pilot works, and when I'm on vacation I can travel.
EMT comes up because I am certified.

University (UC Berkeley)
Neurology is an expanding field that is set beside psychology.
I have asked about friends research and it compels me; I already have study topics brewing.
This would be a great job to write with but my words may become lost in translation or end up becoming the next Brave New World by Huxley instead of the other ideas I started to mingle together.


I'm questioning if I'm the type of person to stay inside or meander without much thought toward the future. when Imagining these lifestyles I wonder how I can do all or any combination. Time seems linear in my culture instead of cyclical. My elders think I spend too much time thinking and not enough time doing. What is my catalyst? Where are my resources? *sleeps for work*

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