Intense breakdown on Large life decisions

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I have been known to be a person with many talents and passions and I could use some expert guidance on what makes one grow into everything they wish to become. This is to begin a philosophical discussion as well as get some advice on this confusing aspect of life. Many have spoken the wisdom of do what makes you happy but know that there are defecates in resources other than willpower and motivation.

There are unwritten stories in my mind which I would love to write yet I know nothing of the publishing world and wold prefer to have some development in life before I begin any; however there is no better time than now and I am a great innovator (being an ENTP jung type).

Music in general is a gift of mine and I enjoy but lack a competitive skill in piano...

Now for the list
Stand up comedy(currently writing), Emergency Medical Technician(Nearly certified), Martial Arts, Magic the gathering, Movie Directing (experience script writing, acting, and as a tech), Bar tender(great presence), Commercial Pilot or flight attendant(joining the Airforce), Curry chef(can already cook), many sciences (AA in Gen science), and psycho therapy.

At some point I got in the middle of my Saturday night. If you take the time to read and have any questions or your own comment on the methods in which we choose a system to operate...you know what to do. Thanks

from an ignorant 21 year old.

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@ModernVisage,

Seems you never established any goal that you could stick with, and changed from one interest to another without giving any one of them much thought.

You need direction. Only you know what makes you happy. Go for it!

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@ModernVisage,

why not make a plan and manage to try them all out...well it's all up to you:) Hope you find what you are looking Smile

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I think it's great that you have all these experiences. That's how one learns. You just did not learn the task, there were other things "taken in."

People laughed at me because I changed jobs every 5 years. I was/am a restless person but I learned a lot along the way.

The biggest thing is that you will know what you DON'T want for a careeer (like bartending)

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@PUNKEY,

I agree that your experiences are basically a good thing as you describe them. I'm impressed by them, actually,

The question about whether to make a living out of what you love is still an open one. I read just recently, again, having read it many times before in one source or another, that the best way to kill something you like as a pastime is to make a career of it. I suspect that may have a lot of truth to it. Personally, making a career out of what I finally learned is what I enjoy most (art and design) was not a mistake for me - I kept enjoying those. Didn't make me rich, but it made me quite happy in the doing, which was what I cared about.

Took me a long time to figure out those two were my main work interests. People vary; I understand Punkey's take, and I understand Cicerone's, though he and I are different. 21 - you are just getting started. On writing, IzzythePush wrote a useful post on this within the last day or two. I'll try to find it and link it. But, essentially, he said "write already".

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@ossobuco,

Here's Izzy's post -
http://able2know.org/topic/184990-1#post-4903372

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@ModernVisage,

To be passionate in life, means you are passionate about everything you do. At 21 and with so much talent, no wonder you are in a state of confussion.

Willpower and motivation is part of being passionate, you strive to succeed and you are motivated to succeed, as you are passionate about the cause, direction.

The variety of talents you have have passion attached but your direction is what is the most passionate to you..

Comedy - to make people laugh, a passion to succeed in that.
EMT - a passion to save lives to make a difference
Martial Arts - a passion to be safe, defend yourself
Movie Directing - Artistic a passion to tell a story that others love
Bar Tender - A passion to communicate on everyones level
Music - artisic a passion to tell a story through song
Joining the Army - again a passion of saving lives and possibly a passion of seeing the world, travelling - flight attendant
Chef- a passion of food
Science / Physco therapy - a passion of knowledge /understanding and making a difference

I see some of the above as "hobbies", and people skills as well as income especially hospitality, in a part time position gives you income to continue to grow in other areas that you desire.

I see music, comedy, directing as (1) unit that all can be followed as a whole, yet individually throughout your life.

Physco and Medical is about helping people and I guess if this was me, I'd be deciding if that is what I wanted to do for the rest of my life as a living, seeing death and pain as well as good ,or if I could use this gift in another fashion and use my passions in song, writing. Which is an arduous long journey sometimes to succeed. But rewarding if it's your main passion.

Why not as I've tried to show, break it all down as to what could be used as hobbies, what is the core passion, value to you of all of it, therefore, what could be stepping stones and what could just be something you have achieved and no longer need, other than when it presents itself again in life.

Knowing nothing of the publishing world is only a matter of asking, reading, learning and finding. Writing itself flows, getting the finaly of the direction and expectations I'd suggest to take a writing course - to publication, I did one once, over the internet, life is about learning.

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@ModernVisage,

I think you find your passions to be shallow, and your talents unfulfilling – they don’t move you in the way that you feel they should, and you can’t figure out why...and again I would say, it’s because of a lack of grounding...much like a boat pontoon in a fast flowing river, that doesn’t have any pylons driving down into the bed of the river – you float above things, but there’s no stability, no substance, and it (the pontoon) can never reach it’s full potential, and in reality, never really become what it was meant to be (without the pylons).

I think perhaps that you have your head in the clouds, and don’t have any actual grounding. You will need to find what ties you to the earth before you will truly soar...and it will be difficult because you aren’t interested in the earth – just soaring...but you need to become interested in the earth too, because it is the foundation of prolonged flight.

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I could use some expert guidance on what makes one grow into everything they wish to become.

Taking one step at a time towards your goal, ever single day, and at every opportunity, and keep on stepping forward, step, after step, after step...

Take responsibility for achieving your goals. Currently you think you can chop & change and just have your desires fall into your lap, your talent sort it out, and a jigsaw puzzle solve itself...it doesn't work that way - although accidents occasionally do happen.

Start walking towards your goal, and keep walking towards it, and when you stumble, get up and walk towards it again...have you ever experienced that in life?

..if you have, then keep that in mind as you go after your other goals. If not, then learn how to do so.

Ie. it's not a secret formula - it's about what's in your mind, and truly going after what you want (which involves : focus, not giving up, persistence, energy, persistence, durability, persistence, strength, persistence...you get the idea)

ie. Be responsible for your life and where it's going, find your grounding/earth...and walk.

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@vikorr,

You are making a lot of assumptions about his grounding. I don't make those. Who told you that people with multiple interests are shallow? I have known a lot of multiply talented people and they have richer lives for it.

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@ossobuco,

Hi Osso - I didn't make those 'assumptions' on the basis of multiple interests (though what you call my assumptions, I see them as educated guesses/conclusions). I had actually written in why I came to that conclusion, before removing them as irrelevant to the OP. If it is accurate, the OP will know so, and presumably understand. If they aren't, then the advice is irrelevant Smile

I'm 90% sure that my conclusion was accurate, but it's not a science Smile

You do notice, I qualified slightly, by putting 'I think' before each thought, rather than just a pure statement?

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@vikorr,

We'll see. I'd hate him to make his decisions based on that all his interests are shallow. I highly doubt that, even if he says they are.

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I know a lot of creative people.
One is a tenured professor, an artist, and violinist.
One is a tenured professor and popular thriller writer.
One is a contractor, designer, and horsewoman.
One is a pharmacologist and artist.
One is an explorer, professor, and writer.
Oh, and then there is farmerman and joenation.
Don't even get me started.
Calling this guy shallow at 21 is very annoying.

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@ossobuco,

That wasn't quite what I was getting out. Rather I was getting at that - if he found his interests to be shallow & unrewarding, then he needs to find his grounding.

What do you make of these :

Quote:

I have been known to be a person with many talents and passions

He has 'been known to be' - that's 3rd person - he's speaking about how other people view him...but doesn't make that claim about himself. Why not?

Quote:

I could use some expert guidance on what makes one grow into everything they wish to become

What does everything he wishes to become entail? Is that just a few things, or one thing? Does he want to achieve them all at once, or one at a time?

Quote:

There are unwritten stories in my mind which I would love to write yet I know nothing of the publishing world and wold prefer to have some development in life before I begin any

And yet he writes stand up comedy. He also hasn't apparently read any books on writing. And what really is stopping him from writing? (the answer is, nothing much, except himself - knowledge of the publishing world isn't overly important if you have a good book)...but the interesting thing is he has 'unwritten stories in his mind'

Quote:

Music in general is a gift of mine and I enjoy but lack a competitive skill in piano...

Having read a book called 'the power of focus' by a concert pianist, his statement was 'it's all about practice, practice, and more practice'. That aside, why does this poster feel the need to mention that he 'lacks a competitive skill in piano'?

Now after all that - he is 21 years old. What do you make of this, and the nature of the introduction to the list ?

Quote:

Now for the list
Stand up comedy(currently writing), Emergency Medical Technician(Nearly certified), Martial Arts, Magic the gathering, Movie Directing (experience script writing, acting, and as a tech), Bar tender(great presence), Commercial Pilot or flight attendant(joining the Airforce), Curry chef(can already cook), many sciences (AA in Gen science), and psycho therapy.

Do you note that he doesn't state what the list is - whether it's his current activities, current interests, or future aspirations? It is in fact a mixture of all of them...and a number of them that are highly incompatible. The list is confusing as to it's nature and purpose...why?

Do you really think he will be a Curry Chef Pilot Pyshotherapist Bartender comedian director with multiple degrees in science? That said, the disturbing thing is a combination of : about the list was -the way it was introduced, together with the included 'interests/activities/etc' combined with the previous statements.

It seems to me that he doesn't find much passion in his talents or interests, and so hops from one to another without ability to settle down.

So...it seems to me that he needs to find his grounding first.

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@ossobuco,

Quote:

Calling this guy shallow at 21 is very annoying.

I can understand (I think) how you arrived at that conclusion, but that is not what I called him.

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@vikorr,

I didn't hear him call himself shallow.

vikorr wrote:

That wasn't quite what I was getting out. Rather I was getting at that - if he found his interests to be shallow & unrewarding, then he needs to find his grounding.

What do you make of these :

Quote:
I have been known to be a person with many talents and passions
He has 'been known to be' - that's 3rd person - he's speaking about how other people view him...but doesn't make that claim about himself. Why not?

He is politely not bragging straight out. This is common.

Quote:
I could use some expert guidance on what makes one grow into everything they wish to become
What does everything he wishes to become entail? Is that just a few things, or one thing? Does he want to achieve them all at once, or one at a time?

He may want to grow complex well, to put it all together. I get that.

Quote:
There are unwritten stories in my mind which I would love to write yet I know nothing of the publishing world and wold prefer to have some development in life before I begin any
And yet he writes stand up comedy. He also hasn't apparently read any books on writing. And what really is stopping him from writing? (the answer is, nothing much, except himself - knowledge of the publishing world isn't overly important if you have a good book)...but the interesting thing is he has 'unwritten stories in his mind'

So, of course he does. He's 21 and just starting writing. This does not make him shallow.

Quote:
Music in general is a gift of mine and I enjoy but lack a competitive skill in piano...
Having read a book called 'the power of focus' by a concert pianist, his statement was 'it's all about practice, practice, and more practice'. That aside, why does this poster feel the need to mention that he 'lacks a competitive skill in piano'?

I have a long ago associate who studied concert piano under Nadia Boulangier, look her up, had trouble onstage. Brilliant guy. Chemist. I think the poster's comment on that is true and useful.

Now after all that - he is 21 years old. What do you make of this, and the nature of the introduction to the list ?
Fine with me, better than most of us at 21.

Quote:
Now for the list

Stand up comedy(currently writing), Emergency Medical Technician(Nearly certified), Martial Arts, Magic the gathering, Movie Directing (experience script writing, acting, and as a tech), Bar tender(great presence), Commercial Pilot or flight attendant(joining the Airforce), Curry chef(can already cook), many sciences (AA in Gen science), and psycho therapy.

Do you note that he doesn't state what the list is - whether it's his current activities, current interests, or future aspirations? It is in fact a mixture of all of them...and a number of them that are highly incompatible. The list is confusing as to it's nature and purpose...why?

He's just typing his thoughts, showing his varied experiences, that's why.

Do you really think he will be a Curry Chef Pilot Pyshotherapist Bartender comedian director with multiple degrees in science? That said, the disturbing thing is a combination of : about the list was -the way it was introduced, together with the included 'interests/activities/etc' combined with the previous statements.

It seems to me that he doesn't find much passion in his talents or interests, and so hops from one to another without ability to settle down.

That is a big jump. You assume he doesn't have passion. I'll admit he is confused, that is the point of his question, how to bring key aspects together

So...it seems to me that he needs to find his grounding first.
What grounding? He will figure out what he cares about.

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@ossobuco,

Quote:

I didn't hear him call himself shallow

I didn't say he did. Your pursuit of this, and putting words in my mouth makes me curious.

If you go back to the start, what I said was :

Quote:

I think you find your passions to be shallow, and your talents unfulfilling

I think... - is a qualifier that implicitly means 'I acknowledge I could be wrong'

...you find... - means 'that from your point of view, you find'...

There is nothing in there that "I find him shallow"

After you questioned, I then further clarified by saying :

Quote:

if - he found his interests to be shallow & unrewarding, then he needs to find his grounding.

There are other such indications throughout my replies to you.

So this has never been about whether or not I find him shallow (which I do not - it appears to me simply that he hasn't found his grounding yet, and everyone has their own personal journey to undertake in life)

So why are you pursuing this matter as if I believe him shallow, or accused him of being shallow?

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@vikorr,

because you mention shallow lots of times re what he is purportedly thinking. A kind of feeding him to think that way.

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@ossobuco,

I mentioned the word 'shallow' just the once in that post, not 'lots of times'. and it was directly qualified as per just previous post.

So again, why are you pursing this, when so many of your assumptions have just been plain erroneous?

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@vikorr,

Pardon me, just substitute head in the clouds.

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@ossobuco,

Osso - head in the clouds doesn't equal 'shallow' - it equals many things which could be any of : a daydreamer, a visionary, an idealist, and it also includes some people with grand ideas but little grounding in reality, and/or people who can conceptualise but not possess what many consider 'common sense'.

I have yet to meet a person that people use shallow & head in the clouds in the same breath. They are used for different purposes.

Are you sure you don't have a personal agenda here?

Aslo, do you understand that I mentioned quite a time back, that if my OP was wrong, then the OP is welcome to disregard it?

1 Reply

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