@vincentsylvan,
vincentsylvan wrote:
This blog is born after listening in ‘you tube’ a famous author and speaker. I was so shock listening to him that I had to go to Google and find out who he was.
Anyway, I do not consider him important; what I consider important is the following;
- Realizing how wrong this man was.
- How well justified his false ideas were.
- How, well educated people can mess you up, if you do not pay attention to the message and compare it with the reality of life.
Some of his believes were;
- The purpose of marriage is not to seal the love between two people in love, but to create a covenant which will make difficult for either party to walk away.
- This covenant was more important than the passion of the romance between the lovers.
- The essence of marriage is not to love each other but the promise that you made to each other at the time of marriage.
- You should not expect to be in love for very long (three months was a long time) because the two of you are different and the differences can’t complement each other.
- Marriage will bring the worst in you.
- You will change when you get married.
- People that are not married and living together are cowards, (okay, he used a different word, ‘scared of commitment’). He also called this relationship “Consumer relationship” because you can walk away at any time.
He compared marriage to the fable of Ulysses traveling though the area where the muses were making the sailors crazy to wreck their ships, and Ulysses tied himself to the mast of the ship to experience the pain and madness of the songs.
I then conclude; “I guess woman is the muses and man is Ulysses. Woman making the man mad and he having to stay away from woman to regain his sanity.”
After many more idiotic statements to long to mention here, he concluded that his was the Christian view of marriage.
I have to say to people like him; “It is no wonder that our spiritual believes are eroding when we have to listen this kind of philosophy.”
Here is what I believe;
- A piece of paper (marriage certificate) will not stop people from divorce.
- Marriage is not an exercise to find out how much pain one can endure.
- Couples can be in love indefinitely when they are properly connected.
- People do not change when they get married; their figure and shape may change through time but not their character and nature.
- People that are living together and not married are not cowards, usually the man needs reassurance he won’t lose his independence and freedom. Women have to take care of that, but when you are properly connected this thinking does not exist.
The basis for his theory was based on interviews of married people; two out of three said they did not love their spouses but they kept married because of the marriage certificate (The Covenant).
I say; “People answer this way because, by being married to the wrong person they lost their youth, ambitions, believes that a comparable partner exist…and hope of a happy life in their future with another person.”
I can see how much work is ahead of me trying to upset all the wrong believes that have been accumulated on people’s minds in this subject over the years. But I have several warriors fighting on my side, they are;
- Your love.
- Your passion.
- Your integrity.
- Your commitment.
- Your Soul… It too, knows I am right!
vincentsylvan
You are wrong here, and the guy you think wrong is clearly more right than you... It was sirens who lured Ulysses, and not the muses... The part marriage has usally played in human affairs is that of bond of peace between two peoples or families, on the theory that to kill family was wrong, and the best way to have peace was by trading women and mixing genes... Even when one culture is dominant over another, the slow process of change required both times of peace and times of violence... It may seen in Germany where most of the place names are Celtic that those eventually pushed out left something behind, and likely some of their culture and genes...
As can be seen in the cermony of marriage today, with its oaths, with time for objections to be offered, and the curse against breaking the marriage, that honor is an essential element of marriage just as dishonor is an essential element of consentual sex or rape... In some societies it is thought very possible for women to dishonor a man so that they must be controlled, secluded or tamed in some fashion... Honor attaches so to marriage because honor can come out of it or be lost by it... Almost the only way that a man with less honor in society can have more is by marriage to a family with greater honor... The proper method of considering marriage is as a form, and all forms are forms of relationship, and it is wrong to consider informal sexual relationships as less than marriage just as it is wrong to consider people in a good relationship only because they are married... Why should anyone marry formally if their relationship suits them??? The oaths and the honor that once made the oaths true are little valued... Words of love are not more honorable only because they are repeated before families when families are no longer required to enforce them... Now, honor is considered an individual matter, and if people are willing to trust, and then to follow up their words of love with work, they already have the best part of any form or relationship in the relationship itself without all the pretense and show...
Selected Answer
Stumble It!
Tweet This
Bookmark on Delicious
Share on Facebook
Share on MySpace