Holy Urethra I Am in Some Pain

um. no.

Don't be so quick to blame the old lady. Look on the bright side. It could be a symptom of prostate problems.

Yes, but it wasn't jalapenos, it was a European cream for back pain that gets
really really hot . I swear I did wash my hands before touching his merchandise...

Ask her how her hands are feeling. If she cut up those peppers by hand, her hands should be burning for a day or so, too. Washing your hands adfter cutting up HOT peppers does little to get the 'fire' off.

I once shot hand lotion up my nose while shopping in Walgreens.

wow wee that smarts.

Another time?

I was holding an open tube of BenGay, and my cat simi came up to sniff it, just as I was moving my hand.
A tiny tiny dot of it got on her nose, which she immediately licked.

Christ Almighty, the aftermath wasn't pretty.

A jalepeno dick is nothing compared to BenGay tongue.

If Gustav sees your post, he will say you deserved it.

It is only gonnorea... Nothing syphilus won't make small by comparison... Maybe wife does not like sports as much as you...Or you as much as sport...

Why is this thread generating ads for brain injury?

I'm not getting those. Think about personally targeted advertising wandel

Thanks.

I thought it was some confusion regarding definitions of head.

Look on the bright side, Garg.
Things could have been far worse.
You could have rubbed your eyes, too!


Not that I've heard.
But then, you wouldn't exactly rush around telling loads of people, would you?

But what I'd really like to know: what was the verdict on the chicken soup?

I get an ad for acne fighting foam...

oh, I cut jalapenos, etc. all the time. I try not to stick my un-soap and water washed finger in my eye.

Could be. I'm getting the same ads.

Jalapeno eye is terribe, terrible I tell you!

I had invited a newish boyfriend to the house for dinner and I was cooking Mexican food. I went to put my contacts in a POW! Jalapeno eye.

My eye swelled shut immediately so I had to wait for newish boyfriend to show up and pry my eye open and dig out the contact.

How romantic!

I never ever ever wore contacts again.

Maybe you should try drinking lots of milk, Garg.

Or treat your wife to some ice cream.

Good luck!

OH!!!
That would have been agony, boomerang!
O my goodness, you poor thing!

Good news, Gargamel. Joe Nation and Thomas will be running a marathon to support medical research for your problem.

So what was really weird was the part where I was just kneeling alone naked in the kitchen and she had to find a way to kill the time until I was right again. Not sure exactly what she was up to while I filled the apartment with my cries of agony. But I was both in incredible pain and particularly aware she was listening to me whimper things like, "Holy ****-**** this is intense."

Of course I told her, "This better be the best ******* soup ever." It wasn't. But it was pretty ******* good.

And my joint is alright. Functional. It didn't retreat into the depths of my crotch when later we gave it another shot.

Now Willie Nelson is singing Georgia On My Mind. I'm writing thank you notes. A pleasant late Sunday evening. All is well.

And that's the main thing, isn't it? All ending well. You survived the ordeal.
I'm so pleased to hear this!

Do you plan to have any meals, involving chilies, in the near future?