Over-55 Housing

Lady Diane likes the idea, I don't.

We lived in one for awhile. Neither of us liked it. There were many, many single women there and they were very active.

Wouldn't dream of considering such a thing until I needed support. Then it wouldn't take me.

Living with a group of friends...maybe in a housing cluster, yes.

I was trying to remember who your partner was, and, now, I know. Thanks!

So, why does she like it and why do you disagree?

So, what did you find unsatisfactory?

So, why do you say nix on over-55 housing?

BTW, I like the idea of what in the US is called "co-housing."

I agree with Deb.

What I think doesn't matter, I can't afford it. But if I could, I'd be even more obnoxious - well, not good for others to be around or even myself. I love kids around, like barking dogs., which I have around at present. I like my neighbors.

I remember my inlaws moved from south LA, a troubled place, to Sierra Dawn Mobile Home Village, a very quiet place with mulberry trees pollarded, don't get me started. Lots of people and behaviors were no-no, not that I remember the proscribing details. No pets, to start with.
I could go on from there, how weird my bro in law's wife and their daughter must have felt when they visited.

I have thoughts about this now, as in my will I will give my house (no gift, trust me, more of a burden) to my niece, who is african american literally. I see this almost as a potential punishment for her - she would probably have to pay to fix it up to sell it. There are no african americans for miles around. So different from my city, LA. I am not part of white dispersion except for the original privilege of owning - I'm part of people who used equity to gain a foothold somewhere else.

I like the southwest, but miss my own culture. To be trapped in a oldie domicile, please, open the trap door.

lady Diane is under the impression she would find more social interaction, I looked out my front window this evening to watch a 4 yr old girl learning to ride her new bicycle. nuf said?

I don't. I say nix for me.

I think I am considering remaining in my own house for the next 55 years.





David

I had a set of grandparents who moved into a senior trailer park in Florida, they pretty much loved it. they liked that it was quiet, people go to bed at a reasonable hour, no need to worry about druggies moving in across the street, a club house with shuffle board leagues and whatnot.

I had a grandpa who moved into a senior residence where he had his own room only, would eat in the dinning hall though he had a little kitchen-ette, nice gardens on the roof and grounds, with a nursing home attached should he ever require nursing care. He hated it with a passion, and was a very difficult resident. This place looked fabulous, the food was gourmet standards and cost over $3K a month 15 years ago, but it was too much of a loss of freedom for him, even though the residents look after themselves and the staff dont come into your room(they called them apartments but I dont think there was a lock on the door) unless you invite them.

Me, I must have a place where my kids and grandkids can come, for a long time if I want them. I plan to stay in my house until I need full time nursing care.

I live near a town that was, in 2007, the most popular retirement town in America. When I was looking for a house, the realtor (who became and continues to be a friend) told me there were two over-55 developments planned. I said that I was not interested.

A co-worker, who just retired from her job as a social worker (this was her second job), owns a condo in FL in an over-55 community. When she told me about it, I thought the last thing I would ever want is an over-55 house in FL!

My daughter and I had lunch together Tuesday and she took to me what is the nicest section of her town. I drove up and down elegant streets for a time but, as I headed west, it became apparent that there was nothing else to see. I told me daughter I was turning around. She said that I should as there was nothing further on the road but a "weird new housing development." She then added it was a 55+ situation.

I said that I felt such a thing was an artificial way to live but, as I am only 62, I might feel otherwise in the future.

She thought such a living situation would make one feel one had given up on life, that it was for people waiting to die.

I told her that is why I felt I was too young. I suspected that there might be a no pets clause in some, if not most, of these developments and that the people there might not be the sort I would enjoy. She agreed on the reason why.


There are many reasons why I wouldn't want this, the primary one being that it is an unnatural way to live, isolated in a community of the aging.

As I told Deb above, I could see cohousing, a sort of more civilized, family-oriented commune.

My daughter and I then moved on to time shares, which she doesn't understand the charm of. We both felt that . . . if we had the money . . . buying an apartment in NYC that was shared among four close friends/close families could be fun. This would be a more individualized situation and not a commercial thing.

No, NO, Please! PICK ANOTHER CITY!!!!!

Is there more to it than socialising for Diane?

You both have some real health problems, and I am wondering if she is seeing that there would be both socialising and some real support if either of you comes to need it?

My understanding is that these over 55 places don't provide much in the way of medical/daily living support, though, and that people who bought in to them hoping for this tended to have to move on as soon as they become unwell.

I can certainly be dissuaded from this view by facts, though.

Everything. The houses were too close, the people talked too loud and too much. They just seem a different sort. They seem old and grouchy. All the women were overweight, with little gray bobs. Not even any good looking men! They play cardgames, the women, and you can hear them cackeling! They want to go places, all together. The rules there were just plain cruel, and I didn't like how that builder, Pulte, treated those people. Me, I told Pulte what to do, and the workers came right out.

Please, no, don't move to one of those when you are only 60 (I think you said). That's 20, 30 or so years to be there with no kids next door, no loud motorcycles or noisy trucks they drive. I enjoy the teens next door, the 18 yr. old wants to be a chef, so he serves elaborate dinners in the back yard with a lightbulb hanging from a tree. Their single mom came over to apologize for a noisy party had by kids w/police called. But, we never heard a thing, we're too far away.

We moved to a small brick house on half-acre because we like to work outdoors, have the grandkids come visit. When we can't mow and dig any longer we'll....well, I'll think about that tomorrow.

Good idea, living at least in same state as your daughter, though. Wish we lived in Colorado. And, I do miss certain things about the north - snow, certain kinds of flowers, wonderful summers, beautiful fall. But the winters - blec, it's cold enough here. I always thought that, should husband go before me, I would like to have roomate or two. I've never lived alone. I can't even imagine anythng past where I am, now, though.

Move to Austin - it is the new New York.

I wasn't thinking about health problems although as a woman of a certain age, I can recognize that I am not what I used to be. My general impression is that there are no more health services in most over-55 communities than there are in any condo complex. I generally think of health services as part of the assisted living community, which would be terrific for those whose body is no longer full of vim and vigor and who either have no family or don't want to 'burden' their families.

A footnote: At age 40, I recognized that I wasn't living the life I wanted in terms of what the kids and I did together so I though I'd take a couple of years, become a high school teacher, stay within my marriage but use my salary for trips in the summer with the kids. Ha! Then, I thought I would retire at 60 in time for my daughter to have my first grandkid and I would be caretaker. Ha! Planning is a lot like dreaming sometimes.

That is what my daughter and I thought an over-55 community would be like. I was part of another internet forum for a time and one woman wrote about the lack of privacy within her community and the barrage of comments. She likes go to church wearing a nice dress or suit and enjoys using some blush. She came home one Sunday and one of the local busybodies shrieked Here she comes all dolled up with makeup! She's gonna get herself a man! She hated not being accepted for what she was . . . which sounded like a woman who thinks it appropriate to wear nice clothes and not jeans and a t-shirt to church.

I have a large yard, which, unfortunately, is pure clay. Ugh! Had to jump on the shovel to plant blueberries. After living for 23 years on a 5,000 square foot lot, this yard seems like heaven. Hoping for a garden and bees in at least one hive.

My parents moved into senior citizen housing . . . which I feel is different category from over-55 . . . that the over-55 folks are still more engaged with the outside world . . . after their house was broken into. At the time, they may have been 70 but certainly not more than 75.

My mother lived in one for a coupla years and seemed to like it. I think I'd like it if I didn't live where I do now. I don't like noisy, screaming kids (of any age) so that'd be a big plus for me. Where I am now, there are no neighbourhood kids (even though there's a school nearby, go figure) screaming and yelling, so I certainly wouldn't move just for that. But yeah, I could go for it for the noise factor (I have uber sensitive ears).

I don't miss anything in the over-55 community except the library. They had their own library! It was a beautiful, large room with huge comfy couch. The books were all donated from the 7,000 residents. I found books that I had just bought, books I'd never heard of that were very good reads. Just walk in, get as many as you can carry, bring them back at your leisure. Amazing.

Actually, that Sun City is just north of us and there is a Scott & White close by. We still use that facility, but now I feel like a regular person going to my doctor and not an old lady joining the oldies. When I go to the beauty shop I tell my stylist, "Don't make me look like an old lady."

I don't think we would have disliked that place so much if we had a common size ranch with a front and back yard. Our garden home was big, but it was built end-to-end so that we had about 10 feet between the houses. We always entered and exited via garage, closing the door behind us. And, I know what you mean about the comments from neighbors.