THE ART SONG

Here's one my mom taught me....

There once was a fa-armer who took a
young miss
Behind the ba-aarn
To give her aaaaaaaaaaaa .......




...... lecture
On horses and chickens and eggs
And told her she had
the most beautifulllll...........





..... manners
For a girl of her charms
A girl who he wanted to
take in hissssss.........







..... washing and ironing and
then if she did
They would get married and
Raise lots of.........





.... Sweet violets
Sweeter than the roses.....

Slap him down again, maw
Make him tell us where he's been

boomerang, that reminds me of this one I learned in the Boy Scouts

Two Irishmen, two Irishmen,
Diggin in a ditch.
One called the other a dirty son of a
Beaver, a beaver,
Sittin on a rock.
Along came a bee
And stung him on the
Cocktail, ginger ale,
Five cents a glass
If you don't like it
Shove it up your
Ask me no questions,
I'll tell you no lies,
If you should get hit with a bucket of
Spit, be sure to close your eyes.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=TywmpMQYojs

The Assumption Song

(for Boomerang and Monterey Jack)

<clapclapclap>

I'll have to learn that one!

How about......


A little miss
Went out to piiiiiiick
Some flowers
She stepped in grass
Up to her aaaaaaaa

aaaankles deep

She saw a bird
Stepped on a tuuuurrrrr

rrrkey feather

It broke her heat
She let a faaarrrrrr

rrrrmer take her home.

Hello I'm Ben Colder

I hear the train a comin' it's rollin' down the track
It's comin' to Folsom Prison to bring me a six pack
It's nice in Folsom Prison the warden's a swell guy
But when I hear that lonesome whistle I feel like I could die

When I was just a baby my mama put me down
Said you are just a baby don't take your guns to town
I shot a DJ up in Reno he wouldn't play my song
Now the DJ's round the country they play me loud and long

[ guitar ]
Hey whatch's that little ole lady doin' in here
(I'm just here to get my baby out of jail)

[ guitar ]
I'll bet there's rich folks eatin' in them fancy dinin' cars
They're probably smokin' coffee and drinkin' black cigars
I knew I's gonna mess that up I never get it right
But when I hear that lonesome whistle I feel like I could die

Warden said ya'll not supposed to do that
When I sing that that's a no no

If they freed me from this prison I'd make like Jesse James
If ya'll won't tell the warden I'll steal this dadburn train
Bust through the walls of Folsom and make that whistle cry like this
And if ya'll'd be nice fellas I'd take you for a ride

And here's the limerick to end all limericks:

There was a pretty young miss
Who went to the river to . . .swim.
Two boys in a punt
Stuck an oar in her...eye
And now she has to wear glasses.

He pecks a few holes in a tree to see
If a redwood's really red
And it's nothing to him, on the tiniest whim
To peck a few holes in your head

Ho-ho-ho ho ho! Ho-ho-ho ho ho!
Oh, that's the Woody Woodpecker's tune
Ho-ho-ho ho ho! Ho-ho-ho ho ho!
Makes the other woodpeckers swoon

Though it doesn't make sense to the dull and the dense
And the lady woodpeckers long for
Ho-ho-ho ho ho! Ho-ho-ho ho ho!
That's the Woody Woodpecker song

Ninety-eight bottles of beer on the wall
Ninety-eight bottles of beer
Take one down, pass it around
Ninety-seven bottles of beer on the wall...

Here we go gathering nuts in May,
Nuts in May, nuts in May,
Here we go gathering nuts in May,
On a cold and frosty morning.
Who will you have for nuts in May,
Nuts in May, nuts in May,
Who will you have for nuts in May,
On a cold and frosty morning.
We'll have [name] for nuts in May,
Nuts in May, nuts in May,
We'll have [name] for nuts in May,
On a cold and frosty morning.
Who will you have to fetch him/her away,
Fetch him/her away, fetch him/her away,
Who will you have to fetch him/her away,
On a cold and frosty morning.
We'll have [name] to fetch him/her away,
Fetch him/her away, fetch him/her away,
We'll have [name] to fetch him/her away,
On a cold and frosty morning.

Row, row, row your boat
Gently down the stream,
Merrily, merrily, merrily...
Life is but a dream.

You're movin' awful slow with that there song, Eva . . .

AHEM. I was waitin' for somebody else to jump in.

Ninety-seven bottles of beer on the wall
Ninety-seven bottles of beer
Take one down, pass it around
Ninety-six bottles of beer on the wall...

Ok, pass me one beer, Eva (or two)..

Okay, two for Francis...

Ninety-six bottles of beer on the wall
Ninety-six bottles of beer
Take TWO down, pass them around
Ninety-four bottles of beer on the wall...

Any more takers?

re: Merry Andfrew

Propel, propel, propel your craft
Placidly down the liquid solution.
Ecstatically, ecstatically, ecstatically,
Existence is but an illusion.

My boomerang won't come back
I've waved the thing all over the place
Practiced til I was blue in the face
I'm a big disgrace to the aborigine race
My boomerang won't come back

I still have that on a 45, edgar. I did a record pantomime to that song when I was in 1st grade. Brings back fond memories...

I love it too.

I met a man the other day, he was dressed in a very strange way
With a great big hat with a big black brim (With a great big hat with a big black brim)
And that’s not all! (And that’s not all!)
Cause around his neck was a big black chain and
Dragging on the chain was a big black ball

Now I met a man the other day, and he was dressed in a very strange way
With a great big hat and with big black brim (With a great big hat with a big black brim)
And a black striped band (And a black striped band)
And that’s not all! (And that’s not all!)
Around his neck was a big black chain and
Dragging on the chain was a big black ball (dragging on the chain was a big black ball)

Now I met a man the other day, he was dressed in a very strange way
With a great big hat with a big black brim (With a great big hat with a big black brim)
And a black striped band (And a black striped band)
And a pair of dark glasses on his nose (And a pair of dark glasses on his nose)
And that’s not all! (And that’s not all!)
Around his neck was a big black chain and
Dragging on the chain was a big black ball

With a big black hat with a big black brim (With a big black hat with a big black brim)
And a black striped band (And a black striped band)
And a pair of dark glasses on his nose (And a pair of dark glasses on his nose)
And a flase moustache (And a false moustache)
And that’s not all! (And that’s not all!)
Cause around his neck was a big black chain and
Dragging on the chain was a big black ball

I met a man the other day, he was dressed in a very strange way
With a great big hat with a big black brim (With a great big hat with a big black brim)
And a black striped band (And a black striped band)
And a pair of dark glasses on his nose (And a pair of dark glasses on his nose)
And a flase moustache (And a false moustache)
And a pale pink sunshade held up high (And a pale pink sunshade held up high)
And that’s not all! (And that’s not all!)
Cause around his neck was a big black chain and
Dragging on the chain was a big black ball

Now if I meet him again today, If he tips his hat or he asks his way,
I'm going to run boy fast as I can cause I want to get away from the funny old man

I met a man the other day, he was dressed in a very strange way
With a great big hat with a big black brim (With a great big hat with a big black brim)
And a black striped band (And a black striped band)
And a pair of dark glasses on his nose (And a pair of dark glasses on his nose)
And a flase moustache (And a false moustache)
And a pale pink sunshade held up high (And a pale pink sunshade held up high)
And that’s not all! (And that’s not all!)
Around his neck was a big black chain and
Dragging on the chain was a big black ball
Dragging on the chain was a big black ball